The Quiet One
by Mage Skywalker
Summary: Shunned by the world he has come to know and faced with a crisis that cuts him off even further Yugi contemplates life, death and his place in the world. Wondering if he can do it all alone.
1. Yugi's Soliloquy

Warning: This fic will deal with intense themes; can be considered slightly graphic and situations may seem down right hopeless at times. In other words this story is not for the faint of heart.

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu gi oh and I don't own Hamlet or Sonnet 29 they are both the property of William Shakespeare.

Please note that this is a no flaming zone. Feel free to criticize and critique to your heart's content, but do use tact please and thank you.

Narration ( )

The Quiet One: Yugi's Soliloquy

(The room is dark no lights on, stifling the once cheery colour of the walls and bright objects of the occupant. The lights on the street give an eerie glow to the gloom illuminating a young boy sitting stiffly on a bed, draped in the inky clothes of mourning.)

"To be or not to be that is the question, weather tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune or to take up arms against a sea of troubles and by opposing end them?-To die-to sleep. "

_To live or not to live and what is living anyway? Is it just eating, sleeping and breathing? Or is it something more? And if it is, is my life worth living?_ It is a question I have pondered for ages, one of life's big mysteries.

"Is my life meaningful to anyone? Or I am just like so many categorize me?"

The words of my past echoed in my head all those people who ether intentionally or unintentionally raked me over the coals, the slings and arrows that eroded my self-esteem and drilled it into my mind that their word was law.

_"You're nothing but a vessel for the Pharaoh's spirit." _

"Sorry twerp."

"He is too weak and inexperienced."

"Who's going to stop me a little shrimp like you?"

"Move it runt!"

"There's two Yugis, the cool one up there and the puny one down here."

Drops of salty liquid made their way down my face. I made no move to wipe them away. _Why bother? I have no one to hide them from, it's not like anyone is concerned with me, heck I don't think they would care if I drop dead, they have him, gorgeous, talented, wonderful, perfect Yami. _I sighed.

"And look upon myself, and curse my fate, wishing me like to one more rich in hope, featur'd like him, like him with friends possess'd, desiring this man's art, and that man's scope." I quoted.

"I don't blame them for liking him more I really don't, he is after all confident, competitive, fashionable and intelligent everything a teenager should be. They can relate to him better then they can to me, I'm just a boy in teenager's clothes. I still enjoy board games, stuffed animals and music where every second word isn't a swear. And I can't blame Yami for breaking away from me either; I can see the joy in his eyes now that he has his own body. He has a chance to live his life again. To go and do what he wants to do, wear what he wants to wear and be with whoever he wants to be with. He doesn't need me holding him back. Always running to defend me from bullies or resting in the shadows of my mind giving me advice when he could just as easily do it himself."

The skull of Yorick lay delicately in my right hand. The cool metal chilled my skin where I touched it, the smooth object never warming to my touch blatantly telling me what I'd been witnessing over the past weeks, our dead link. What was once as strong as iron had rusted over and crumbled to dust. Once upon a time we could talk about anything and everything then slowly something came between us, I honestly don't know what it was but come it did. Soon he could no longer hear my thoughts or feel my emotions, and then I could no longer hear or feel him. He went to the beautiful castle and happy ever after and I was left lost in the woods. _I see now how foolish I was to think that he cared about me, to think that he liked me or that I was important to him. _

"I was just his responsibility not his friend or his companion or his partner as I was stupid enough to assume. I was only his job nothing more." And that slap on the face from reality stung and left its mark. It shattered my heart into a thousand pieces and trampled my soul like so many dead roses. "Yet I still thought he was sincere." I snorted "Yeah right get a grip, Yugi, you are a stupid, weak, midget and runt just like they say."

I coughed, startled out of my musing I suddenly noticed how stiff my body was, pins and needles drove in everywhere as I moved for the first time in who knew how long. _I bet Yami never gets like this and even if he does I bet people fall over themselves to massage him. _

"He has a life now; he has friends who will stick by him no matter what." _They always said that to him never to me. _"I should be happy for him, but I'm not! I'm so riddled with jealousy that I almost hate him! I know I sound so selfish but I want to be the one he feels that way for! I want to be the one who makes his eyes light up when I enter the room! And I want to make him smile that smile he once reserved only for me!" I tossed the puzzle to the floor totally content to watch it smash on the hardwood and fall apart like my world, but before it was even half-way there I snatched it up by the chain and pulled it into my lap.

"I can't do it, even after all he has put me through I have no right to take away his life. So what right does that give me to take my own? Why do I want to do it? Is it just for the sick satisfaction of looking down or up as the case may be in the afterlife and feel better because they are in pain, to see them in tears and feel smug that I've given them what they have given me? An eye for an eye a tooth for tooth as they say. I think that is why I want to do it for revenge, and if that be so then I won't do it. I remember when I told Duke that revenge wasn't good because it only left you with more bad feelings and I intend to stick by that. Why should I toss my life away just because they tossed me aside and into a dark corner like yesterday's homework? After all I've lived for fourteen years without friends I can do it again, I know I can."

I wrapped my arms around the puzzle holding it close to my chest as I would a newborn baby.

"And I will still protect the puzzle; keep it safe from those who would seek your power Yami. I will hold up my end of the bargain." I brought my hand up to my face and touched the black ring forming around my left eye. "Even if you no longer hold up yours."

I got up from my bed and padded silently to my desk. Opening the bottom most draw, I carefully placed the puzzle inside; I admired it for a moment, the lamplight glittered upon it revealing the lines of each individual piece that made it up. I remembered all the nights under the covers working by flashlight to finish it. The frustration when a piece wouldn't fit and the joy when it finally clicked into place. I'd spent years on the object, _and all for nothing_ I thought bitterly. I slammed the drawer closed and locked it, then placed the key around my neck. It was so much lighter than that golden burden.

I looked out the window as a thin band of red appeared on the horizon.

"Dawn."

I went over to the window and watched the arrival of the new day.

"I will face this day and the many days that follow it for I have my answer..."

I wrote it on the window where my breath had condensed on the glass.

To be

"To be."

(End chapter 1)

Note: So? Love it? Hate it? Drop a review and let me know. As the 'end chapter one' suggests this is not a one-shot I have not yet begun to make Yugi miserable.


	2. Keeper of the Flame

Wow nine whole reviews this is great! And now the responses to those reviews:

Son Cara: Good idea but that's not the plot of this story.

Riye Link/ Reue: Very good review

Mimiheart: Yes this idea has definitely been used before which is why I originally planned not to write a fic like this but inspiration struck and I never ignore that. I also plan to take the idea in what I hope is a whole new direction, which means no suicide, no running away and no getting hit by fast moving vehicles.

Camille: I have every intention of finishing this fic I refuse to leave the readers hanging. (Even though my other story is long over-due for an update but that is beside the point. Stupid writer's block)

To everyone else:

YumeTakato

Phoenix51

Soleil-chan

Katya Motou

Ten-Kih Ho-shih

Thank you so much for the wonderful reviews and I hope you all continue to like the story.

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu gi oh and the song belongs to Terri Clark.

Narration ( )

The Quiet One: Keeper of the Flame

(Blue shorts and a white top adorned the young boy as he bounded into the room occupied by two men who made small talk.)

"Hey Yami, Grandpa."

They never looked over at me didn't noticed the huge smile on my face nor the medal around my neck. I shrugged it was nothing new and headed to my room. Upon reaching it I went to my desk removed the medal and placed it beside a growing stack of papers. I had thrown myself into my studies; with my after school time no longer spent at the arcade homework had moved up the priority ladder. I had begun to improve my grades, came to class on time and was attentive. I had started saving my money for university doing odd jobs around town wanting to become a teacher one day. My hand moved from thumbing through the papers to clutch the medal once more, I traced over the smooth curves of the runner carved on the surface. Running from bullies half my life had finally come in handy for something; it allowed me to join the track team. I wasn't as tall as the others so I couldn't get a lot of speed off the mark but I had the most stamina and could cross the finish line of a distance race first with ease. Today had been the big meet; I had hoped maybe Yami and Grandpa would come to see me I had told them no less than three times during the week. _I just don't learn do I?_

There was a tournament at the mall today and of course everyone went there to watch Yami kick his opponent's butts across the arena and back, but the one person who I was sure would be there I saw sitting in the front row at the track meet. Seto Kaiba, I couldn't fathom what he was doing there. He never passed up an opportunity to challenge Yami or at least snap at him from the side lines. Yet he was right there watching the whole thing and I think he almost looked proud when I won, again I wasn't sure why we weren't friends, just members of the chess club. Well you really couldn't call it a club as we were the only people in it. We got together during lunch and played we had yet to have a victor and that made it much more comfortable. We didn't have the intense rivalry as he did with Yami and I liked it like that. _Oh well the Seto mystery can wait until later there are other things to think about. _I thought a smile tugged at the corners of my mouth as I recalled my accomplishment.

_I won all on my own, no Yami, no friends just me and nothing not even those disinterested snobs downstairs can take that away from me._ I couldn't wait to tell Ethan; he was my little brother of sorts. I worked with him three days a week he had started out as a volunteer project to keep myself busy but it quickly developed into the best moments in my life. They were the only times I was truly happy, when I smiled and laughed and acted like a kid again. Of course being a five year old it was easy for Ethan to bring out that side of me I thought had died. Running was more of an escape then anything else a chance to get away from it all knowing that at the end I would receive a pat on the back rather then a punch to the stomach. Now that the run was over I had begun to dig up thoughts that we probably better left alone.

I took the key from around my neck opening the drawer that held the golden object, several pictures of my former friends and me were scattered around it. I tilted my head to the side looking at it and thought about my strange feelings towards the once puzzle dweller. I didn't want to call it lust because I didn't just like him for his body, but I didn't want to call it love ether. To love someone who doesn't give you the time of day wasn't logical, so I guess it became a crush a feeling in my heart that I toyed with every now and again. _Figures my first crush would be on the one person I don't have a hope in Hades of getting._ I decided Yami was like those displays in store windows at Christmas time, big, shiny, spectacular, and beautiful, and I was the little boy with my faced pressed up against the window wanting nothing more then to have the glass melt away so I could touch it. But it is much more then glass that separates Yami and I, in a day it was lucky if we said two words to each other. With Grandpa it was even worse I considered it a treat if he acknowledged the fact that I entered the room. I felt like a guest at a hotel, just being there for the sake that I had nowhere else to go.

I turned on the radio and let the soft melody fill the room.

We pass in the hallway  
I stop to kiss you on the cheek  
But you're in a hurry  
You've got a deadline you must meet  
You're working so much these days  
You don't have time to spend with me  
But I keep hoping we might get back  
To the way love used to be

I am the keeper of the flame  
You only helped me build the fire  
And it's getting harder every day  
To make our love burn with desire  
'Cause If I left it up to you  
Only ashes would remain  
When it needs shelter from the rain  
I am the keeper of the flame

We live here together  
But I feel we're worlds apart  
When I tell you I love you  
You never listen with your heart  
I may look like I'm doing fine  
But I'm dying deep inside  
'Cause I've done all that I can do  
To try and keep this love alive

I am the keeper of the flame  
You only helped me build the fire  
And it's getting harder every day  
To make our love burn with desire  
'Cause If I left it up to you  
Only ashes would remain  
When it needs shelter from the rain  
I am the keeper of the flame

I could sympathize with the lady, how much she wanted things to be as they were, keeping alive the fire of what once was hoping things would change and knowing that they wouldn't because the other wouldn't meet her half way. There were still times their rejection stung; nights spent silently crying myself to sleep. Moments when I wished I had someone to share my day with, talking about all the fun I'd had with Ethan or hearing a "congratulations" for a mark on a test. But those cravings for total companionship were few and far between; that little voice on the edge of heart that told I was nothing without Yami and the gang grew softer everyday, I thought maybe the worst was over.

Oh how wrong I was.

(End chapter 2)

Note: My computer is being a pain in the butt and will probably have to go in to be fixed, so the next update might take sometime.

I hope you enjoyed your trip on The Quiet One express please make full use of the complimentary review button on your way out.


	3. The Enemy is me

Notes:

tati1: It might be a Seto and Yugi pairing I haven't fully decided on the whole romance aspect of this story.

Ten-kih Ho-shih: The first chapter is meant to be vague. It is meant to show Yugi being mentally close to suicide rather than physically close by say standing on a bridge. It is also of course in Yugi's point of view so his thoughts are quite jumbled.

Mimiheart: lol no there won't be a slow moving vehicle either. I'll save that for another story.

Disclaimer: If I owned Yu gi oh this story would be on a bookshelf in Chapters and not on this website.

Narration:

The Quiet One: The Enemy is me 

The Turtle Game shop shook with heavy footsteps as Yugi stormed up the stairs and into his room. Slamming the door shut and throwing his backpack under his desk.

It had been one of those days where it just didn't pay to get out of bed. Alarm not going off, burning breakfast, getting yelled at for burning said breakfast, studying for a test in the middle of a paper ball war, and trying to deal with people who came from the land of Morons 'R' Us. I had obviously become very sarcastic as of late. I couldn't figure out exactly why. Maybe I was just going through that rebellious teenage stage where I hated everyone and everything. Of course it didn't really work that well if the world hated you back. Yami and company's behaviour towards me hadn't changed, not that I expected it to. _Well that isn't entirely true _I thought wryly The dumb, naïve, and stupid part of me still held out hope they might take sympathy in this.

Reaching across my desk I picked up a roll of cough drops and unwrapped a small lemon flavoured one. I popped it into to my mouth and started on my homework. My throat had been bothering me for a while now. At first I thought I was just coming down with a cold, but even I knew you didn't 'come down' with a cold for two weeks. I would have asked Grandpa about it but I was pretty sure he'd just tell me to tough it out and not bother him or Yami. After all we can't risk the health of the great 'King of Games'. One sneeze and Grandpa is all over him like a mother hen, asking him if was okay and did he need anything. But I cough and its

"_Yugi, I thought I taught you manners, that is very rude if you must do that do it in private." _

I shook my head to bat away the memory and blew out a breath of frustration. _Don't think about Grandpa his opinion doesn't matter, I don't need him!_ I could do things for myself he wasn't important. What he thinks about me shouldn't hurt, but darn it did! He was my only family and even though he treasured Yami for being the perfect grandson and probably prayed every night for me to be run over it didn't changed the fact that he was still my family.

I cupped my hand over my mouth as I started coughing again. My chest heaved with the effort as if trying to dislodge something. The fit lasted for several minutes and as it subsided I felt something wet on my palm. I looked at it and found it speckled with blood. My eyes widened at the sight. I sat there for several minutes blinking at it trying to convince myself it was really there. _Okay it's official I need to see a doctor. _

I went to bathroom to wash it off, my stomach felt rather queasy as it ran down the drain. Blood was not my favourite thing to look at. I then crept silently across the hall to Grandpa's room and began searching the stacks of paper on his desk for my health card. 1

_Yami…Yami…Solomon…Solomon…Yami. Oh for crying out loud where is my stuff?_ I finally spotted a document with my name on it wedged between the desk and the wall. I pulled it out flipped it over and found that it was my health card. _Yes first good thing of the day._

I went downstairs and found Yami and his friends in the living room camped out on the couch.

"Yami, I'm going out."

He grunted in response and waved his hand dismissively, not taking his eyes off the TV. I just turned on my heel and stalked out without a backward glance muffling a few coughs into my shoulder.

&&&

I arrived at the clinic talked to the receptionist and was directed to a room at the end of the hall. I went in and sat on the examination table and was met by Doctor Scott a few minutes later.

"So, Yugi, what brings you hear today?"

"Well I've had a cough for about two weeks now and recently I've started coughing up blood."

Doctor Scott looked thoughtful pushing a few stands of black hair away from her face as she wrote down this information on her clipboard.

"Have you had any other symptoms headaches, sneezing, dizziness, congestion, fever anything like that?"

I shook my head no.

"Open you mouth and stick out your tongue."

I did as she told as she looked at my throat and gave me a general physical testing breathing, temperature and that sort of thing. She then moved her hands across my neck in slow circles. Starting from the back and coming forward. I winced as her fingers touched the area around my Adam's apple.

"It's tender?"

"Yes" I replied hoarsely.

She turned around and picked up what looked like a stick with a light on the end.

"What is that?"

"This is a laryngoscope" she answered holding up the tube. "I'm just gone to move it down your throat so I can get a better look at what is going on. Okay?"

I nodded and she proceeded to spray some kind of local anaesthetic into my throat that would help prevent gagging. As she moved the tube around a picture of my throat appeared on the small TV attached to the instrument by a wire.

"I don't like the looks of that." She said pointing to a small bubble like mass on the screen. "I'd like to do a biopsy and find out what that is."

I wanted to back away from her as she said that but couldn't as the laryn-whatever it was- was still jammed down my throat.

"Oh no, Yugi don't worry I can get a sample with the laryngoscope it will be totally painless I promise."

True to her word I didn't feel a thing. However the room seem to grow cold as she went out to take the sample to whoever was supposed to look at it. I began to feel a sense of dread growing in my stomach as I stared at the door and waited for her to come back to tell what was wrong with me. I wasn't a simpleton I knew what a biopsy was done for and I just hoped that that wasn't what the results were going to say.

Doctor Scott came back some time later with a solemn look on her face. She came up to me and put her hand gently over mine.

"Yugi, the pathologist has looked at the sample and…well there is no good way to deliver bad news but the results do indicate a cancerous growth…"

Time came to a complete and total stand-still. If I thought the room was cold before it was an ice cube now. Doctor Scott continued to explain stuff to me but my mind registered nothing as my brain attempted to process the verdict she had just given.

"…I would like to run more tests to determine staging." She sounded like she was speaking through a muffled microphone.

I just nodded dumbly and sunk into a numb state that was eerily reminiscent of that episode in Duelist Kingdom. I paid no heed to the taking of blood, some CT scan or anything else they did to me. 2 I partially snapped out of my trance as I was gently pushed towards the door.

"Now, Yugi, if you have any questions or need support you can call this number and I will notify you when the results come in."

"Thank you" I answered my voice flat and went out the door.

&&&

_This must be how a prisoner on death row feels like when walking to the execution chamber._ The sky was overcast and grey. The sidewalks seem to stretch on forever as a moved slowly down the street. Pinpricks of rain began to dot my skin as I stepped into a shop and two pairs of eyes, one crimson and one violet seemed to watch my every move. It was the soft click of my bedroom door closing that alerted me to the fact that I was truly home and it was then that reality came crashing down on me. I fell onto my bed wrapped the covers around myself, buried my face in the pillow and sobbed.

_Cancer I have cancer! No it can't be the doctor made a mistake it was someone else's results it had to be. I'm too young to have this happen to me! Oh God I'm going to die! ... No I can't I want to live there is still so much I haven't done. I haven't graduated yet, I haven't even been kissed yet! I'm sorry I contemplated suicide I'm sorry I ever let such a stupid and morbid thought enter my mind./ _

"I want to live!" I screamed my cracked and broken cry echoed to the ceiling. My fists slammed into the wall. It felt good so I kept doing it. My hands started to turn red but I didn't care it was something else to focus on and I only stopped when I heard footsteps coming up the stairs.

The door swung open and Yami stepped in. He looked at me with a calculating stare and sniffed disapprovingly. _I must look so pitiful to him._ With my runny nose, tear stained face and I was sure my eyes were red from crying. _May…maybe he will come over and comfort me and tell me that everything is going to be okay._

"Yugi, I know you must be having a bad day but that is no reason for you to behave like this. I expected better from you as my other-half."

"But, Yami-"

"But nothing, Yugi, look just because something doesn't go the way you planned is no excuse to fall to pieces like this. Imagine what the world would be like if everybody cried like a baby when something went wrong. Remember, Yugi, you are not the only one in the world with problems!" He yelled.

He sent me another piercing glare before turning around storming out and slamming the door behind him.

"I know everyone has their own problems Yami and I don't mean to burden you with mine. Even if my problem might kill me."

End chapter 3

1 I don't know how it works in the rest of the world but here in Canada you need one of these cards whenever you go to doctor, hospital etc.

2 I know the results an test happen rather fast but I am assuming Yu gi oh is in a timeframe at least a few decades ahead of our own and the test can be done right away and the results can be obtained faster.

I have done research into this topic and will try to portray it as accurately as the story will allow but if something is incorrect or missing don't be afraid to let me know.


	4. Silenced

Rejoice an update! Man I have got to be the worst updater on the net.

Notes: Wow questions, questions, questions.

For everybody wondering what kind of cancer Yugi has: Yugi has laryngeal or larynx cancer. All the details about it will be given in this chapter.

To all who believe Yami is a moronic moron…well he is. However he does have reasons for his idiotic behaviour which I will get into later in the story.

Finally the million dollar question, will Yugi die? That is for me to know and you to find out.

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu gi oh it is the property of Kazuki Takahashi.

Signing ' '

Narration ()

The Quiet One: Silenced

(Yugi sat on a small metal railing in the Domino High school courtyard, body completely rigid, eyes unfocused, and thoughts far away from the world around him.)

The world was ending and I was the only one who knew it. The sky was falling, the ground was crumbling, and the air had turned stale. I couldn't focus, I couldn't think. How long had it been since I had found out my bodying was rebelling against me...a day…two days…a week? I felt disoriented and nothing like myself.

I found my routine changing. Homework was left half finished, clothes were left on the floor and then put on the next day wrinkled and stained with last night's pizza. Nights were the worst though, sometimes I would bolt up wide awake in the middle of the night the thought 'I have cancer' running across my mind like a neon diner sign. Other times I would lie there afraid to go to sleep and have the thoughts that plagued me all the other nights. It was a vicious insomniac cycle. I was a wreck and I had told no one. First off whom would I tell and when. It wasn't like I could just waltz up to my old friends at their lunch table and blurt out, "guess what I have something that might kill me isn't that great!" Yeah that would go over as well as a flat nosed paper airplane.

I sighed, leapt down from my perch and started walking home. There was only study period after lunch so I wouldn't be missed. I knew I should spend this time eating, but I couldn't. Not only was I starting to have difficulties swallowing, but the reasons for that difficulty had made me lose my appetite entirely. I knew it wasn't good for me at least according the couple of pages I'd read in a book in the library. I hadn't gone any further though I couldn't. If I did it would make the whole thing tangible. Not that it wasn't already, but without the test results back I could still dream that everything was a mistake that she would phone me back and tell me it was nothing more than an infection or strep throat or-or something not so serious. If I learned about this thing if I found out it had a name. If the list of symptoms matched what I was feeling then it meant I didn't belong to that wonderfully oblivious group who believed that nothing bad could ever happen to them anymore and that scared me.

&&&

I arrived home and found the shop dark and empty. I figured Grandpa had gone out grocery shopping or something. I sat down on the couch in the living room and continued to work on the puzzle I'd started last night. It was a good way to pass the time and it helped to calm me down at least a little bit.

I was half way done when the phone rang.

I jumped, startled by the noise. For a while I just sat there not wanting to answer it not wanting to hear what I was sure they were going to tell me. Still the ringing continued. I looked over at the end table. The object of my demise sat there looking so innocent with its white curled cord and crack in the cradle from the time Yami had gotten a little too aggravated at a telemarketer. Finally I moved over to it and with my hand shaking like a leaf I picked it up.

"H-hello."

"Hello is, Yugi Mutou, there?"

"S-speaking."

"Your test results have come back and Dr. Scott would like you to come in as soon as possible to discuss them."

"O-Okay…is there an opening for t-tomorrow?"

"We have an opening for four 'o' clock."

"That's f-fine."

"Okay and the doctor recommends you bring a family or close friend with you, and something to take notes with."

"I will."

"All right will see you then goodbye."

"Bye."

I hung and slumped down to the floor _she wants to talk it can only mean more bad news. _

&&&

"Yugi, I've been waiting for the last five minutes for you to make a move. Are you going to play, or is this a new strategy to win through boredom?"

"Sorry, Kaiba, I just have a lot on my mind," I said and moved my knight.

"Apparently otherwise you would have realized you can't make a move like that."

I looked down. He was right the knight was now sitting on one of his squares half way across the board. I blushed highly embarrassed and moved it back to its proper position.

"If I were the type of man to be concerned about your little life I'd asked you what is so important that it has you playing like a two year old."

I ran my fingers across the back of neck nervously, the buckle that was once my trademark gone as it was too painful to wear. For a brief moment I wanted to tell him. Spill out the whole story and just get out in the open. Even if he just sat there and laughed at me at least I wouldn't have felt so alone.

The bell rang just then and the opportunity for help past. I sank into my seat as he grabbed his briefcase and with curt nod to me left the room.

&&&

"All right class will continue this tomorrow," the teacher said just before the shrill ring of the bell drowned out the movement of students from their desks. I started as one my classmates bumped my desk in their rush towards the door. I just sat there in shock for a moment.

The day couldn't be over already. I checked my watch. It read three 'o' clock exactly _well this thing is obviously broken. _I looked up at the clock no it was indeed three 'o' clock, only an hour to go. Where had the day gone?

"Mr. Mutou, is there something you wished to talk to me about?"

I focused my eyes from the clock to my teacher and realized I was the only one left in the room. I shook my head no and walked out the door.

&&&

"Yugi Mutou," the receptionist called out.

I looked up and nodded not wanting to strain my voice anymore than was needed. She motioned for me to come to the desk.

"Dr. Scott will meet you in her office. Good luck."

I went down the hall and met Doctor Scott outside her office door. She looked at me. I thought I saw tears in her eyes.

"Yugi, the results are conclusive and well…" she trailed off running her hand through her hair she looked very nervous. "Listen I've never been very good with this sort of thing. The-the results-well the results are not what we would have liked them to be and I'd like you to meet with another doctor. His name is Dr. Goodrich he can explain everything in more detail than I can."

She had never been flustered in the entire time that I'd known her and that was not a comforting thought. My stomach began twisting itself into knots and I started scanning the walls looking for a washroom or better yet the bright red letters of an exit sign.

"Dr. Goodrich is the leading oncologist here in Domino." I heard Doctor Scott say, I just continued to stare at the walls.

We reached the end of the hall and stopped in front of a large door that had a gold plaque with the name Albert Goodrich engraved on it. I looked up as she opened the door to see an older man with a white beard and gold rimmed glasses sitting at a large oak desk covered in papers. There was also a nurse off to one side of his desk wearing a white dress

"Hello, Yugi, I am glad you could come on such short notice."

They all looked at me with half-hearted smiles. Suddenly the room felt like it was shrinking and I really didn't want to be there anymore. _I want to go home _I wanted to run back through that door and hide under my bed. Still I managed to get my nerves and my stomach under semi-control. I went over and shook his hand. I sat in the chair and placed a tape recorder on his desk.

"Now before we begin I would like to remind you that what we wish to discuss with you can be very traumatic. If you wish we can let someone be here with you, did your parents come with you?"

"No."

"Did a friend come with you?"

I shook my head.

"Did you bring anyone with you?"

The answer was still no.

"Are sure you want to continue?"

"I'll be fine," I answered trying to convince myself just as much as him.

"Very well I have gone over the results and you have what is called laryngeal cancer. This is a cancer that grows on or around the vocal cords. I must admit it is very rare to see it in someone as young as yourself. However because you are young this counts in your favour."

"Is there anything you can do?"

"Oh, yes there are many treatments options, but first I would like to discuss your condition in more detail."

I just nodded some more it seemed to be the only thing I could bring myself to do.

"The grade of cancer has been determined from your scans and has been broken down into four categories T, N, M, and an overall stage.

The T stage is at T3 which means that the cancer has grown through out the larynx and the vocal cords don't move normally. Of course you already know that as you've complained of vocal problems already. N is the stage at which the cancer cells have spread to the lymph nodes. According to your tests no cells appeared there so your stage is N0. The M stage describes the spread of the cancer in general. The scans do show cancer cells in the lungs as well so the grade stands at M1. Finally the overall stage is a 4c. This means that the cancer is advanced. Now I don't want you to panic and think that means it isn't possible to treat. It is, but it just means we would move forward with treatment a little faster than with an average patient. Do you understand so far?"

I nodded.

"Due to the nature of the cancer I believe the best course of action would be radiotherapy combined with chemotherapy. The radiotherapy will target the cancer cells within the larynx and chemo should destroy the cells that have metasized. Hopefully the cancer will go into remission and we will not have to surgically remove it."

"What happens if you do have to remove it?"

"Surgery would require that at least part of the larynx be removed. At the size of the mass now it would require the full removal of the larynx and you to use a mechanical voice box for the rest of your life. That is something we strive to avoid and I would much prefer to look at that option when the damage is less severe."

"How would the treatment work?"

"We would perform the treatment for approximately six weeks. You would go for radiotherapy five days a week and chemotherapy once a week. There would then be a three week recovery period."

"How much will it cost?"

He sighed. "I won't lie to you, Yugi, the procedures are very expensive insurance may cover some of the expenses, but the rest will have to come from you."

"How long do I have to decide?"

"I would recommend approximately two weeks to think about it and to discuss it among your friends and family. If you have any concerns at all don't be afraid to tell me. If you wish to get a second opinion I will gladly recommend a number of my colleagues. Do not feel pressured to do anything you are not comfortable with. This is not the only option available to you, Yugi, we just feel it is the best option. It is entirely up to you and your family to decide how to handle this."

I stood up and shook his hand again "Thank you for everything I'll be in touch when I decide."

I quickly left the office and made my way to the front door. As the automatic glass doors slid shut and I felt my knees give out. I crumpled to the hard concrete and cried.

&&&

Several hours later I was still listening to what I had been told in the office. I listened to the tape over and over again until it sank in until I felt sure I understood everything I'd been told. I couldn't believe how I'd handle myself in there I sounded cool and collected the exact opposite of what I felt.

"If you wish to get a second opinion-"

I snorted as I shut off the tape. I didn't want a second opinion I just wanted to be cured. And I wanted to be cared for under his direction. The more I heard him the more comfortable I became with Dr. Goodrich. He was soft spoken and to the point, but even his professional tone couldn't hide the feeling of compassion I felt from him that he truly cared about what I was going through. He reminded me of Grandpa.

"Yugi, get down here and help with dinner!"

_Well the old Grandpa not drill Sergeant Grandpa. _

I went downstairs I was assigned to the salad. I stood there tossing it when a stray thought occurred to me that nearly made squirt dressing all over the counter. _It is entirely up to you and your family to decide how to handle this. _How was I going to tell them? Did I just bring it up over dinner tell them to come with my to my next appointment, write them a letter and put it in the mailbox what? With that one fleeting thought I was back into the fight or flight mode. I felt my heart start to pound in my chest. I stirred the salad harder than necessary and a few leaves fell out of the bowl.

"You don't need to beat it to death, Yugi," Yami said.

I managed a half smile at him and picked up the leaves off the counter. I put the salad on the table and sat down my mind occupied about what to do about them. I had to tell there was no question about that I would need their support. Not just emotionally, but financially as well. Still the question was how. I had to subtle about this I had to tell them at the time when there were relaxed and might take sympathy on me. I mean who was I kidding if they hadn't noticed how miserable I'd been in the last week or the 'sore throat' that was going on four weeks then they certainly weren't going to care that I would be going to the hospital six times a week for the next two months. I would have to make them care about me and make them believe me.

&&&

Three days later I still hadn't told them. I didn't know why I hadn't …well that wasn't exactly true actually it was a downright lie and I knew I didn't want to tell because I couldn't find a time that seemed right and with school, Ethan, and preparing for treatment it just slipped further down the list of things to do. On the other hand I had managed to overcome my fear of knowing about my disease and had been researching about it. I found about treatment options and agreed with Doctor Goodrich that what he proposed was best. I had even learned about some of the side effects associated with them the most common being fatigue. The one book I was reading now said that resting was the best thing I could for myself. Of course that meant spending a lot of time in bed. I looked around my room taking in every aspect to decide what should be changed so I wouldn't drive myself insane while trying to recover. My eyes fell on the window and a conclusion was reached, _I want new curtains._ It was my last thought as I headed out for my first phase of treatment.

&&&

_I hate this place already_ I thought as I made my way the hall of the hospital's radiology centre. I turned down the last corner and was met by a young red-headed woman.

"Yugi Mutou?"

"Yes."

"Hello, Yugi, I'm Doctor Read I'll be the leader of your radiology team."

"Nice to meet you," I said and shook her outstretched hand.

She led me into her office and told me all about the treatment I would be receiving with her. How it would work, what side effects to expect and things I should be doing during the treatment.

"Now that I've covered everything do you have any questions?"

"Not right now."

"Okay then I will need you to sign this consent form its just standard procedure," she said she handed me a sheet of paper.

I looked it over it seemed to be in order and I sighed my name in the space at the bottom.

"All right now if you'll just follow me I'll show you are treatment centre and let you met the rest of the team."

I was lead into a large room and was introduce to at least ten different people and I forgot the names of at least half of them. Still somehow knowing that there were all these people involved in helping me recover made me feel better.

Doctor Read then pointed out the white machine against the far wall.

"This is a simulator it acts just like a real radiotherapy machine only it won't actually produce any radiation. We use it to line up the ray in the proper area for treatment-"

"One question."

"Yes, Yugi?"

"Is this going to make me radioactive?"

"I get that question a lot and no you won't this will only target your neck and the dosage is very low."

"Okay."

"Now as I was saying we will be using this machine to line up everything properly for treatment. Once the position has been determined we will mark off the area in blue. The blue markings will not be permanent so what is normally done afterwards is the area is marked with a tattoo that will be. You don't have to have it done the blue marks will stay on quite well however it can be difficult to keep them on for an extended period. It would require that you protect the area when you bathe and not have your clothes rub against them if they are smudged we would have to re-align them again."

"Would the tattoos be very noticeable?"

"No they won't be much bigger than a beauty mark. You don't have to decide right now will just be using the blue mark today. I'll set up another appointment for you in a couple of days. Will re-check to make sure everything is still in place and you can tell me then if you wish to have the tattoos put on."

After the explanation the team began to get me ready for the simulation. They set me up on the board with a small headrest. Then they placed something called an Aquaplast on me. It felt like a hot towel on my face. After a few minutes or at least it seemed like it the plastic was hard and looked like a really ugly hockey mask.

"Now I'm going to be outside while we do this. An intercom is in place so we'll be able to hear you at all times don't worry."

I heard the door click shut and then heard the machine start up. I lay on the small board as the rest of it circled around me. Bright red beams surrounded me on all sides.

"Just relax and try to breathe normally, Yugi." I heard Dr. Read say over the intercom.

_Just think about how Yami would act it a situation like this_ I told myself then closed my eyes and waited.

&&&

The whole thing was done about forty-five minutes later. I checked my watch as walked down the street. _Oh shoot I'm late._

I took off and ran fast as I could down the streets before finally slowing down as the Rockywood Elementary school came into view. I made my way down the hall to room 301. I looked around and spotted him by the window. I went over and made sure he could see me. I moved my hands in the familiar gestures so he would know what I was saying.

'Hi, Ethan sorry I'm late.'

'It's okay. Where were you?'

'At the doctor's.'

'Did the doctor make you better yet?'

I smiled. 'He's working on it.'

He got up and grabbed his jacket from the closet.

'Can we go to the park?'

'Sure I'll push you on the swings.'

It was a short walk to the park as it was only two blocks away from the Ethan's school. It was an unusually warm day so I discarded my school jacket in favour of the white T-shirt underneath and sat down on the bench to watch him. It was so relaxing just to sit there with sun shining between the branches of the trees, but mostly it was because of him. Even with everything weighing down on me it felt like I could just forget it all when I was with him. All he had to do was look at me with those large brown eyes half hidden by red curls, smile that wide grin and I turned to putty.

Sometimes it was hard to comprehend how much we'd grown to like each other. When I first signed up for the mentoring program I expected to just be given some little guy who would worship me and we do all sorts of fun things together and then I'd met Ethan. Who at the time was more interested in throwing toys and sulking in the corner than in having anything to do with me, and the feeling was entirely mutual. At first I wasn't sure I even wanted to put in the effort it would require to learn to communicate with him let alone attempt to build some sort of bond. In the end I did and it turned out to be a wonderful thing for both of us. He came out of his shell and I learned to trust again.

He really was an amazing kid. I mean there was a piece of the world he would never know and yet he was even more upbeat than Joey once you got to know him of course. It made my problems seem a little smaller and I would just enjoy moments like this as long as I could.

&&&

"Charles, honey now come on it is just a cleaning I promise everything will be fine."

"No! No! No!"

The small boy threw himself on the floor and began kicking and screaming while his mother tried desperately to calm him down. I buried my face further in a magazine I'd picked off the rack.

As my radiologist suggested I made an appointment with the dentist to make sure everything was good shape as she said the radioactivity might affect them. Sitting in the waiting room pretending to read as the kid continued his temper tantrum I was reminded of why I hated coming here. It wasn't that I was afraid of the drills or the pointy objects I had long since out grown that. What I hated was people being overly close to me and putting their hands in my mouth and probing it with things that looked like they came out of the Frankenstein movie was not something I liked to go through. If it weren't for the fact that I was seventeen I would have thrown myself on the floor too.

I felt the same way half an hour later as a sat in the hard plastic chair as a tube tried to suck off my lip and the dentist sprayed water in my mouth.

"All right, Yugi everything looks good now I just need to make some impressions so I can prepare fluoride trays."

I just lay there until he was finished and then high tailed it out of there. I bought a package of fabric markers on my way home. Two hours later I had drawn all different kinds of designs on my plain white curtains until they looked like something out of Dr. Seuss. Was it childish yeah probably, but I didn't really care.

&&&

I stood in front of the mirror after my second session of radiology fingering the small black marks on my neck. They certainly weren't what my classmates thought of when getting inked. Actually I though they looked like little marks made from a ballpoint pen. The skin had been stretched the needle inserted and then there they were. Just then I heard a knock on the bathroom door.

"Yugi, come downstairs we need to talk," Yami said through the door.

I had half a mind to tell him to stuff it…still I did have to tell them about what was going on and now was a good time as any. _Oh screw it. _I thought and went downstairs.

I found them in the kitchen. Grandpa motioned to the table and I took a seat. They sat down on the opposite side and suddenly I was reminded of the interrogation scenes in those old cop movies.

"Yugi, we know something is bothering you now we would like you to tell us what it is."

I breathed in deep, ready to spill out my sob story to them…but nothing came out. I tired again…still nothing_. It won't work, why won't it work!_ I placed my fingers to my throat my mouth still opening and closing it like a fish out of water. I couldn't feel the usual vibrations of the vocal cords. I looked around frantically for a pencil paper something-anything to communicate with. They looked at me their eyes criticizing their bodies tense with impatience and I panicked.

_I can't breath…I can't focus it's too much. _The next thing I knew I was out of the chair and half way out the door.

&&&

Sometime later I finally stopped running. Leaning up against a street lamp to catch my breath I tried to find my bearings. I spotted a familiar plastic tricycle and the ungodly mailbox that had fallen victim to one of Mr. Hick's artistic sprees. _Ethan_. _I wonder if they would mind_. I started walking towards the house. I had never come over unannounced like this before, but it was better than sleeping under a bridge or something. Still I might be interrupting something. Well it couldn't hurt to ask. I reached up and knocked on the door. Five seconds later, _I guess there not home. _I had just stepped off the stoop when I heard the click of a lock.I turned back around to meet the confused faces of Ethan's parents.

'Mr. and Mrs. Hicks I am sorry to bother you like this, but can I stay here just for tonight please?'

"Of course come in."

'Thank you.'

They ushered me in and sat me down on their living room couch.

"Is something wrong?"

I don't know what it was, but that question just started the water works all over again. Mrs. Hicks came over and hugged me and I did what I couldn't do at home. I spilled out the whole story to them using signing and a note pad.

&&&

I lay on their couch and stared at the ceiling. They both had been incredibly sympatric. Mrs. Hicks had made up the couch and Mr. Hicks had told me their door was always open if I needed a place to stay again or just to have someone to talk to. I tested my voice over and over again in hope that they problem at the Game shop had just been some fluke, but still nothing. It was the final nail in the coffin so to speak.

I had waited too long. The decision had been made for me. I could not tell them. I would never be able to get them alone long enough to tell them through a notepad as I had here. Besides who was I to destroy their perfect little world? Would they have even cared if I'd told them? Something told me they wouldn't. And what would it be like if they did? I shuddered at the very idea. I knew those people and as caring as they had been back in the day there was an underline feeling of over protectiveness. That just because I was short and had the innocence of a child it was assumed I had the maturity of one too. I knew if by some miracle I could get their attention and they did care they would treat me like fine china. They would always want to be watching me. Making sure I didn't get in trouble, didn't get hurt, and didn't deal with reality. They'd think I couldn't handle it. They'd tell me I get through it just like always and maybe I would, but having people smother me and pretend like nothing was wrong would not help and in the end only hindered me. I would rather they didn't know and think I'm a baby than know and treat my like one.

Besides I could do it alone. I was as strong as the next person and it wouldn't last long. Just go through the six weeks of treatment and my life could go back to normal. Like everything else though it never turned out to be that simple.

(End chapter 4)


	5. Just a Little Unwell

Sorry for the long wait for an update _again_. With school winding down I'm crossing my fingers that I can get a better updating schedule going.

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu gi oh it is property of Kazuki Takahashi.

Narration ()

The Quiet One: Just a Little Unwell

(The sun was barely above the horizon as Yugi reached his second home and entered the familiar glass doors. His gaze was fixed on the floor. He arrived at the room and was immediately called in.)

Five days of treatment and food now had only two tastes, metal and cardboard. _I hate this. _I thought as the nurse called me into the room. I was at the hospital once again about to undergo my first round of chemotherapy. I was led into a room that contained several chairs with an IV stand on one side. He pointed me to one at the end of the row.

"Now-

_You have no need to worry. Will be right here. _I had heard the words enough in the last week to fill a lifetime.

"There is no need to worry I'll been in and out if you need me."

I winced a little as he unclamped the catheter and prepared to attach the drip line. Although the initial soreness had worn off it was still disconcerting to have the catheter there. It had been inserted to make this process easier or so they said. Personally I thought it was just making it worse. Instead of having some IV stuck in me and having a bruise for a week I got to have a plastic tube under my skin until further notice.

He finished up and left the room. I sat back in the chair and watched the clear liquid drip slowly down the tube. Quickly growing bored I pressed my hand against my throat and tested the fragile cords. Not getting any response I dropped my arm back down and tried to sink even further into the cushions. Today wasn't a good day.

My hand went to my pocket and reflexive grabbed for the familiar notepad and pencils. I flipped through the pages and noticed that I would need to buy a new one as this one was almost full. As most conversation was never directed at me anyway some my voice had returned. It was only for short intervals and it still sounded like something out of a horror movie. So I continued to stay silent, it was easier that way, with those closest to me anyway. It didn't work quite as well with cashiers, teachers, and bus drivers. I had taken to wearing shirts with higher necklines and hoped people would take the hint. Most of them just seemed to think I was an idiot wearing something like that in the middle of April.

Reaching into my backpack I pulled out a book we had begun studying for class. As I opened the thick bindings I was suddenly very grateful I had decided against upgrading any of my courses. The workload would have doubled and that was something I did not need. The regular amount of homework itself seemed insurmountable, and all I wanted to do these days was sit in my room and wallow in my misery. Even Ethan fun and wonderful as he was, was taxing. Not so much physically, that would come later, but emotionally. After the radiotherapy I still had to go to school, Grandpa still liked help around the shop, and Joey still ruffled my hair as he passed me in the hallway, because life wasn't going to stop just because I wanted it to.

I came out of my thoughts and saw that the nurse had removed the line.

"You're all done."

_I'm obviously thinking too much. _

"I'll see you next week, Yugi."

I nodded and attempted a half hearted smile before I grabbed my jacket off the back of the chair and headed home.

&&&

_They're here _I thought as I heard their familiar laughter as I came in the front door. Answering my Grandpa's greeting with a small wave I followed the sound into the living room. The gang smiled at me before going back to whatever they were doing before I invaded the space. I went over and sat down in a vacant chair in the far corner. The tired feeling had set in almost immediately and it was so nice just to stretch out and listen to the soft chatter. To have them talk about simple easy things like schoolwork and jobs. It was so easy to lean back and close my eyes and have everything just melt away.

&&&

Several pamphlets lay scattered on the top of my desk as I looked over a paper with a long column of numbers down the front. I penciled in the last number and stared at it. _It can't possibly be this much!_ I checked over my calculations, there was nothing wrong with them. In a fit of frustration I scribbled out the total and threw my pencil against the wall. Obviously odd jobs just weren't going to cut it. I needed another source of income. I leaned the chair back and let the front legs come up off the ground and thought about what kind of job I should get. I could ask Grandpa for more hours helping in the store, but he had taken to paying me in duel monsters cards and older games. Of course that had been fine back when games and fun were the only things important to me, but now the monthly payments made a more practical form of payment necessary. _Wow I sound old._ Still there wasn't much else I could get. I wasn't very experienced and I hadn't graduated yet. I looked out the window and I caught sight of a familiar building. _I wonder if…_ He was back from his international Dice Monsters deal perhaps he was hiring. I'd have to by careful though if anyone found out I'd be grounded for a year, but what other choice did I have.

So it was with my mind telling me I was an idiot that I made my out of the shop and towards Duke's down the street. Grandpa would kill me if he knew I was doing this. He may have liked Duke personally, but their businesses were still in competition with each other. I entered the large building I found him taking inventory in the back.

"Hey, Yugi, haven't seen you around in a while, what's up?" He asked stepping off a ladder.

"Nothing really," I said and wished my voice sounded normal.

"You okay?"

"It's nothing serious."

"If you say so. So what brings you here?"

"Uh… I know this is going to sound weird, but I was wondering if you could give me a job."

"You mean that?"

I shrugged. "I told you it was weird. But yeah I really do."

"Sure why not? I could always use another stock boy."

"Really just like that?"

"Yeah, I already know you so I know I can trust you."

"Thanks, Duke."

"Anytime, just stop be the front desk on your way out and they'll set you up."

&&&

With yet one more thing on my to-do list it was easy to get caught up in what I was doing and not pay attention to Yami and his gang when they came around anymore. So it was easy to ignore them one night as they talked in the living room. It was a fluke that I was even home. This was one of my days to spend with Ethan except his parents had invited me to dinner instead. I had come home to get ready I was just about to leave again when their conversation stopped me cold on the stairs.

"I just don't what to do about him."

"What do you mean, Yami?"

"He has been so distance lately. He hardly says a word to me."

"Well ya have been kinda busy lately."

"Still it's like he's not happy that I'm making a life of my own."

_Yes Yami I'm ecstatic for you. That you got your own body and proceeded to forget I ever existed. Let me find a bucket to express my joy. _

"We all saw him on Saturday he just sat there and didn't say word to any of us!"

"I hate to say it, but Tristan's right."

"Yeah, but it's not like Yugi maybe something is wrong."

"Then Yugi would have told us so we could help him. I mean this is Yugi were talking about."

They finally shut up and I sat there numb. _So this is what it's like_ I thought as I sat on the top of the stairs. To realize that after less than two decades of life you've failed at it. That those who are supposed to care about you the most believe you are a bratty snob. To know they truly think you are brushing them off because you can't possibly have more important things going on. That you should just hang back and let them handle everything because they know more than you.

I wiped my face with my sleeve stood up and walked down the stairs. If they wanted to make nasty comments about me they could at least have the decency to say them to my face.

As I walked past them I heard their gasps and running feet as it dawned on them that I heard everything they'd said. I quickened my pace and grabbed the door handle.

"Yugi! Wait!"

I didn't want to hear their stammered apologies because they'd crushed my precious feelings and slammed the door behind me.

&&&

The next day I was walking down the street focusing on the night out rather than those I'd left at home. I couldn't remember the last time I had such a good time. That dinner conversation actually included me. Where I'd laughed and talked adamantly about everything. It was the first time in a long time I'd felt like part of a family even if they weren't my real family.

"Hey, Yugi, wait up!"

I looked behind me and saw Joey and Téa running down the sidewalk and waving their arms. I figured it would be easier to have them talk now than suffer through days of being hounded everywhere I went. I slowed down and let them catch up with me.

"I'm sorry, Yug, you know about what I said," Joey told me and put his hand on my shoulder.

"Me too, Yugi, it's just that we…" she trailed off obviously finding harder to talk to me than about me.

"Well you know how it is. We've all said stuff about each other we didn't mean."

_Yeah, but we never said them behind each other's backs._

"It's just you've been quiet lately and we feel like you're ignoring us," Téa piped in again.

_Join the club we have jackets._

"But," she added quickly "it's not that we don't want to be your friend anymore."

"Tea's right, Yug. We're still your best buds and we always will be."

_Lies it's all lies!_

I looked up at them as the prepared to get to the really point of this conversation.

"So are we cool now, Yugi?"

_No were not cool this is not my fault I didn't ask for this! _Yet despite all my thoughts and convictions, I nodded. I saw the relief and joy fill their eyes and I reminded myself that I was no longer important enough to shatter those illusions. I wouldn't tell them the truth because that would be taking advantage of them. Making them deal with things I should do on my own. That I could do on my own. I also reminded myself that this wasn't forever and they would never know anything had happened. Besides they'd actually made an effort to talk to me and take my feelings into consideration for once, so maybe just maybe this meant things were going to change.

(End chapter 5)


	6. Demon in the Dark

Thanks for the reviews everybody hope you enjoy this new chapter.

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu gi oh it is property of Kazuki Takahashi.

Narration ()

The Quiet One: Demon in the Dark

(Yugi stepped out the shower just in time to hear the door to the house close. He bowed his head and walked over to the mirror.)

_They didn't even ask this time. _I thought securing the towel around my waist. Picking up a soft brush I slowly moved it through my hair, thinking back to the promise they'd made to me. It had been short lived as usual. Yes there had been several outings. To the arcade, Burgerworld even a movie or two. Basically they went everywhere I love to go or loved to go anyway. Of course I had gone to all of them and hoped against hope that it meant things were going to get better, but soon I realized that was not the case.

I had tried to enjoy myself, but I found I was so disconnected from them that I just couldn't let go of my problems like I use to. I'd wondered if I should really be eating all the junk food pushed on me. Or I'd constantly check my watch at the movies to make sure I would get enough sleep for my treatments and my job the next day, and of course there were Saturdays. When I had to spend my time sitting in a room watching a liquid enter me and ravage my body, and one could only come up with so many excuses to not hang out with their best friends on the best day of the week before people started to get suspicious. I could see it in their eyes and the guilt ate me up inside. Still I did my best to push those feelings back, put a smile on my face. To be the person they wanted me to be so they would stay. Obviously I had not pretended hard enough. Things went back to way there were the way they were meant to be I guess.

I sighed and put the brush down and pulled out several long strands of hair from the bristles. I did my best to eat properly, but the treatment was already taking its toll. I was losing weight, my hair was thin, the skin on my neck looked liked a ripe tomato, and I was tired all the time no matter how long I slept for. _So why am I going to bed at eight o clock again?_

I put on my pyjamas and went downstairs. I poked my head around the corner into the living room to see my Grandpa sitting on the couch watching a movie. Thinking better of my plans to bid him goodnight I turned around and headed back upstairs. One time me going to bed before ten was met with a concerned stare and a gentle squeeze on the shoulder. I reminded myself that that was a long time ago and maybe he thought I was too old for those things. So, I continued to my room climbed under the covers and let my head fall amongst the pillows. To sleep and for moment to be free of the world and the harshness it possessed.

&&&

I awoke to the sound of the birds chirping outside the window and the feeling of something warm across my chest. I rolled over to see the source of the warmth and yelped in surprise.

"Yami!"

He blinked and yawned. "Good morning, Yugi."

"What-why-who-" _Wait why doesn't my voice sound like I'm an eighty year old man?_

"Something wrong, Yugi?"

He looked at me and seemed really concerned. He cares for me and I don't feel sick it's like none of this ever happened. _Was it all just a dream?_

His hand came up and cupped my chin. "Yugi?"

"Oh, Yami, I had a horrible dream that you abandoned me and I had cancer and…"

He chuckled, "it was only a dream. Now come on let's go."

"Go where?"

"To school of course we can't be late for the last day before break."

"No of course not." _I guess. _

We met the gang outside the shop and started walking towards school.

"Hey, Yug, thanks for the math notes they were a life saver."

"Uh…no problem, Joey."

We talked and laughed and Joey and Tristan got into petty fights. Everything was exactly like it should be and yet it all just felt so wrong. And the feeling continued as after school we packed up our stuff in to a truck somebody owned and drove off to the woods.

&&&

I sat on the ground and watched the flames of the fire flicker in the night trying to make sense of this. It was everything I'd dreamed of us being together and myself being included it was just too good to be true.

Suddenly I realized I was alone, the others were nowhere to be seen. It was just me and that really creepy wind blowing through the trees.

"Um…guys?"

The bushes rustled and they appeared again only it wasn't really them. They had been replaced by their younger counterparts. I recognized a twelve year old Téa and fifteen year olds Joey and Tristan. I could never forget the greedy grins that they gave me when they saw something they could take from me to cause me pain. Nor could I forget the condescending look Téa had given me when she had been trying to become popular and belittling the dopey loner kid was the way to do it.

"You're such a geek, Mutou, no wonder no one likes you!"

"You act like such a girl!"

"You're worse than a five year old!"

With that they began to slowly back away into the shadows.

"Please come back! I'll-I'll make right whatever I've done to make you guys hate me just don't go!"

"Why would we want to be with someone so sickly?" Yami sneered in disgust. "You're so weak and pathetic you probably did this to yourself," he said and turned away to follow them, his long cape billowing in the wind.

With them gone a strange black mist crept along the ground I scrambled away only to have it take the shape of a monster. Salvia dripped for the sharp fangs and its dark red eyes trained on me. I cried out in pain as it lunged at me, its claws scratched at my face, its body pushed against my face. Smothering me, I choked against the hairs that filled my mouth and my fingers pulled hard against the fur on its back trying to break free.

&&&

My hands shook as I desperately tired to untangle the blankets _wait blanket? _I stopped struggling and sat up as it dawned on me that I was in my room at night not in some forest with the people that haunted my past.

It was just a dream. A horrible nightmare _I can't even get away from this thing in my dreams anymore._ I wiped my hand across my face to remove the beads of sweat only to have it another liquid come away with it. I grabbed several tissues from the box beside me and pressed them under my nose to stop the flow of blood. After several minutes the nosebleed subsided I leaned back against the headboard. Even though the dream was over I still felt strange the beast was gone, but I could still taste the hair in my mouth and my hands still felt like they were clutching its fur. _It was just a dream so why can I still feel it-No oh, please no it can't be. _My hand slowly reached up to me head I felt my hand touch bare skin my whole body shook as I reached for the light switch.

The yellow light flooded the room illuminating the strands of black, red and blond that were scattered all over the pillow. I bit my tongue to keep from screaming only to remember a second later that it didn't matter. I pinched myself hard and hoped I was still dreaming. I squeezed my eyes shut and opened them again and every piece was still lying there in silent mockery. What would people say? I couldn't hide something like this. I knew it could happen I had even seen people in the ward with it, but still I'd hoped no prayed that I'd be one of the lucky ones who wouldn't have to deal with it. With the way my luck has been so far I should have known better than to hope.

Oh Yami would be so disappointed in me. It was one thing to have a weak and whiny other half, but a bald one too? I would never hear the end of it. Somehow someway I had to keep even this hidden, push it deep into this sea of lies I have created even if I already felt like I was drowning.

Slowly almost mechanically I gathered it all in my hands and put it in the garbage can. I carefully placed several old papers over top so no one would see. I made sure my bedroom door was locked so Yami and grandpa wouldn't come in and see me like this. Then I moved back to the bed and tried to fall asleep again knowing no good would come from dwelling on yet another misfortune, it was a school night after all. Still I just flopped down and lay there wide awake. I was still too shocked about what had happened and I was too scared. I wanted comfort and protection and that was sleeping in a room across the hall or maybe…I got from me bed and padded to the closet. Opening the door I pulled out a large stuffed animal. It was the largest one I owned and the newest one too. Yami had won it for me before we had drifted apart, before this had ever existed.

_The carnival had come to Domino and we had all decided to go to it to spend time together. Plus it was an excuse to ride the rides until we were sick and then go eat an unhealthy amount of junk food. We had just arrived when I saw it wrapped around one of the tent poles at the midway. I stopped and stared at it after all it wasn't often you saw a plushie version of an Egyptian god card, complete with an out of this world price tag. I sighed and shook my head knowing I couldn't have it not unless I didn't want to have any money for greasy hamburgers and chilli fries later. _

"_Come on, Yugi, we can't have chills and thrills standing around here!" _

_With that Tristan grabbed my arm and dragged me towards the roller coaster leaving the prize behind. Yami must have noticed me staring at it though because at the end of the day it was packed up in a bag that was slung over his shoulder. _

"_Wow, Yami, how much did you have to spend to win that?"_

"_That's not important. I got it for you. I saw you looking at it earlier today." _

"_Yeah, well I didn't think I could really have it. After all it was like 500 tickets."_

_He sniffed and put his free hand on his hip. "I always rise to a challenge, Yugi."_

"_Yeah, and blow your entire allowance in one day." _

"_Come on you know I'd do anything for you."_

Until it came time for you to think about yourself and it's better this way. It is, it has to be or I'm going through this agony for nothing. We're both growing it's a good thing.

I looked into the large yellow eyes. _And yet here I am still sleeping with a stuffed toy. _I knew I was too old but right then just for one night I needed the comfort only it could provide. I lay back down on the bed and let the red coils curl around me. I buried my face in the folds of its wings and made my plea.

_Someone help me. Please someone help me._

End chapter 6


	7. Unexpected Aide

Thank you to all my wonderful reviewers and readers. Please enjoy the new chapter.

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu gi oh it is the property of Kazuki Takahashi.

Narration ( )

The Quiet One: Unexpected Aide

(Yugi stood in the bathroom his back pressed against the door and his pyjamas hanging off his thin frame. His faced was flushed red and his eyes were half closed in exhaustion.)

The heat was almost painfully intense and my head felt like someone had encased it in a giant ball of wax. I could vaguely hear someone talking loudly to me through the door, but I couldn't bring myself to acknowledge them. A persistent beeping brought me far enough out of my fuzzy daze to fully open my eyes. I looked at the thermometer as the digital numbers blinked back at me. It was high way too high. _I have to go to the doctor I have to-_

"Yugi, come on I am not going to tell you again!"

_Have to go to school_.

I stumbled back to my room and mechanically began to collect my stuff for the day. I slowly reached into my drawer and pulled out the beige fishing hat. It had been a joke gift on my last birthday. So far no one had really questioned it for that I thanked my lucky stars. Oh, there had been a lot raised eyebrows and giggling from my classmates. Joey and Tristan had jokingly asked if I was trying to hide a horrible haircut, and Grandpa had only told me to take it off during dinner. That had earned him the best Yami-esque glare I could muster. It must have been pretty decent because not a word had been mentioned since. Still I was worried, I knew my luck wouldn't hold out forever someone was bound to take the direct route one day and just rip it right off me, and it was probably going to be one of the teachers. It was against the school dress code to wear hats after all. Then again it was also against the code to add buckles, sequence, and neon coloured shoe laces to the uniforms, but that didn't stop more than half the school from doing it anyway.

Knowing I was just going to have to risk it I jammed the hat my head and went down to meet Yami tapping his foot on the floor as Grandpa shoved a lunch bag in my hand and all, but threw us both out the door yelling that we were are going to be late.

The walk to school was relatively quiet for the first bit and for that I was eternally grateful because I didn't think I could handle ideal gossip over the pounding of my head. It wasn't until I almost walked straight into a lamppost that Yami tried to make any sort of conversation.

He chuckled. "You know, Yugi, those posts wouldn't jump out and surprise you if you kept you eyes off the sidewalk."

"Yeah, sure, Yami, whatever you say," I mumbled not even attempting to look at him just trying my best to make my voice sound as normal as possible and splitting my attention between two things was enough to make me stomach start trying out for the circus. It all just made me want to curl up into a ball on the pavement and die. _Could this be any worse?_

"You're worried about that test in math today aren't you? Well don't be you'll do just fine."

_The test! Oh man, I forgot, ack someone shoot me!_

&&&

"All right all you wimps today we are going to run laps. Now everybody warm up and get out there!" The teacher blew his whistle and everyone got form the bleachers everyone, but me that is.

He walked over and stared at me with his blue beady eyes. "And why do you think you're exempt from this, Mutou?"

"My doctor recommended that I don't do any unnecessary physical activity."

"Did your so-called doctor give you a note?"

"No."

"Well without a note you can't slack so get out there and run!"

With no other choice left I got off the bleachers and started after my classmates. It was in that one moment trotting in the heat that I saw with great clarity just how far I'd fallen. I use to be such a good runner I should have been able to leave everyone in the dust. It was then that I made what was to be one of the stupidest decisions of my life in the name of pride. I began to push my body harder forcing my legs to move me towards the crowd. I just had to make it ahead of them for just a moment.

If I could just run fast enough then everything would melt away. I wouldn't be sick anymore, my friends would come back to me, and everything would just like it use to. _A little more…just a little farther. _I kept going, kept pushing even as my stomach churned and I felt the bile slowly rise up my throat, swinging my arms and legs wildly even as I felt them hit the pavement, and the world blurred and went black.

&&&

_Am I dead yet?_ I thought as I came to. I blinked and recognized the plain white ceiling of the nurse's office. _How did I get here?_ I turned to the side and was met with the sight of a pair of ice blue eyes illuminated by the glow of a shiny silver laptop. _He didn't bring me here did he? _Seto looked up from his work just then as if hearing my question, closed the top of his computer and put to the side.

"Before you ask yes I did bring here I couldn't just leave you in the middle of the track like that after all you were blocking everyone's path. No I did not stay here out of the goodness of my heart, but as an excuse to get out of that waste of a class and do something productive."

Without thinking I moved my hand down from my mouth my palm open. 'Thank you'

'You're welcome. Don't expect me to do it again.'

If I hadn't already been sitting down I would have fallen flat on my butt. 'You know sign language?'

'When you run an international company it comes in handy.'

He walked over and stood by the side of the bed. He had strange look in his eyes and if I hadn't known any better I would have thought it was concern.

"I've seen you run, Yugi. You could beat the pants off of anyone on that pathetic thing they like to call a track team without breathing hard, yet you pass out today after less than ten minutes. It's not like you."

Whether from the stress or from an extreme desire to have someone know I wasn't sure, but either way I grabbed my notebook out of my short's pocket and wrote I have cancer on it in big bold letters and showed it to him.

"You can't be serious."

_Ah, Seto Kaiba ever the sceptic. _I reached up and pulled the cap off my head, which remarkably had stayed on, and watched him recoil in shock. If it had been at any other time I would have found the sight hilarious.

He suddenly stumbled backwards I reached out to him only to realize a second later what a stupid move it was as my stomach threatened an encore presentation. I got very dizzy and fell back on the cot. I felt his cool hand and my forehead.

"You have a fever."

'I know.'

"And you came to school why?"

'Grandpa made me.'

"Are you that much of a child that you need his permission to deal with this?"

'He doesn't know.'

He got that god-smacked look on his face again and just stood there gaping like a Flying Fish in water.

"Oh."

'Thank you again' I said and slowly made my way off the cot.

"And just where do you think you're going?"

I finished tying up my shoes and turned back to him. 'I can't stay they told me to contact them that it was dangerous if this happened.'

"Well why didn't you just tell me?"

Before I knew it I was being scooped up in his arms and he was on his phone telling Roland to bring the limo around.

"Yugi, don't spread it around that I am such a nice guy. I have a reputation to uphold."

I just nodded numbly and went limp in his hold as we headed out into the parking lot.

&&&

"You should have contacted me immediately, Yugi, you know how serious this can be."

"It came on suddenly and we weren't really in a position to come here directly, sorry."

Thankful that Seto could think on his feet in times like this and had come in with me. Doctor Scott normally wasn't one to take any sass, but she was probably just thankful that I'd finally brought someone with me after they told me every session how important support was.

"Yes well do make sure you are more careful next time. In the meantime I'll put you on antibiotics for the next two weeks to be on the safe side. Will continue with the treatments for now, but if you show any adverse affects from this I will have to postpone them."

With that I got ready to go. I expected Seto to simply leave as he'd fulfilled his good deed quota for the year, so I pick my prescription and prepared to start the long trek home. Only to have Seto grab the collar of my jacket with one hand as the other pressed into my back and guided me back towards the limo.

"Take us home," he instructed the driver.

I just gaped at him.

"Did you really think I was going to let you go home in this condition? I may be a cold-hearted creep, Yugi, but I am not stupid."

'I need my stuff.'

"You can never just take a hospitable gesture at face value can you? Fine have it your way."

We pulled up on front of the Game Shop and I went in and grabbed my things as fast as I could. Only I made the mistake of going out the shop door instead of the side one.

"And just where are you going, Yugi?" Grandpa asked peering over the top of his newspaper.

"To a-a friends house just for the weekend," I answered and quickly went out the door before he could question me further. It was getting painful to talk and I didn't want to waste what little voice I had left.

The drive to Seto's mansion was silent. It wasn't until we had arrived and he had showed me to one of the many bedrooms that I got up the nerve to speak.

"Why are you doing all this for me?"

"You know, Yugi, I'm not interested in your proclamations of friendship and never have been…Still there are some things no one should face alone and this is one of them. And don't talk you sound even worse than you look."

I nodded taking off my jacket and climbing into the king sized bed. I was ready to just to collapse and forget this crazy day all together when I felt my stomach flip over again. I leaned over the side as it emptied whatever was left in it. My face was flushed in embarrassment as I sat hunched over the bed until nothing came up, but dry heaves.

"I'm so sorry, Seto."

"It's all right carpets can be cleaned that's why I have a maid, and I told you not to talk."

I went into the bathroom to clean up where Seto continued to hover over me like the mother I'd never had. _Why does insist on being close every second? And why do I like it?_

As he led me back to bed we ran into Mokuba in the hall.

"Hey, Yugi, what are you doing here?"

"I-"

"He is slowly learning that when I say don't talk I mean it!"

He just looked at us quizzically. "Okay then."

"We'll talk later, Mokuba, right now I want to get Yugi settled he'll be with us for a few days."

With that I went back to my unofficial room and lay down, as Seto all but shoved the spoonful of medicine down my throat. I swallowed and fell back amongst the mountain of pillows already feeling drowsy and grateful to finally be able to just leave this day behind me.

&&&

I woke up a little later and looked at the clock to see I'd been out for about three hours. Feeling ten times better I decided to test myself and brave going downstairs in search of food. Carefully inching my way down the stairs my hands gripped the banister tightly my feet pushed into the plush carpet to keep my body steady. I heard voices coming from a room by the landing. Looking through the rungs of the stairs I saw that the door was open and I could make out who was inside. Seto sat in a plush arm chair Mokuba curled up in his lap. Knowing I shouldn't barge in on what was obviously very a private moment I just sat there and listened.

"Seto, if something happens to Yugi what-what we'll do? I mean I know you've never really liked him, but I've always thought of him as a friend and…and, why does everyone I get close to leave?!"

"Life will go on without him, Mokuba, you know that. As for him leaving those are the risks you take when you let emotions cloud your judgement."

"Isn't there anything we can do?"

"There are some things in life that not even money and power can fix. The best thing we can do is spend as much time with him a possible because I'm not sure how much more we're going to have."

_Wow, he really does care. _

(End chapter 7)


	8. Me and Me Alone

A great big thank you to all my reviewers and readers you guys make writing this story all the more enjoyable.

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu gi oh it is the property of Kazuki Takahashi.

Narration ()

The Quiet One: Me and Me Alone

(Yugi sat patiently in the waiting room. Ignoring the hardest of the chair he flipped through a magazine, swung his legs in the chair and looking almost happy to be there.)

It was all over. I could scarcely believe it, I was so excited I could have skipped down the street on the way here. I was finally finished, the treatments had ended and now I was going through the recovery period. The final sets of tests had been done last week and the results were in and I was going to be free again. No more needles, no more drugs, and no more secrets. Everything was going to be okay again I was sure of it.

The nurse motioned for me to go in and I gladly obliged.

I sat down in the firmly office and wanted for them to tell me the good news.

"Thank you for coming, Yugi," Dr. Scott said and sat behind the desk with Mr. Goodrich

"Your last batch of test reports have come back your body has responded well to the treatments, but unfortunately the cancer has not gone into full remission as we originally hoped."

I sat back and felt myself completely deflate I'm sure shrank about two inches in that moment. No, no there weren't supposed to say that! Why?! I went through all that only to find out that that thing was still there! Why Me?! Why Me!? Why me!?

"However the primary tumour has reduced in size significantly and now we are in a position to operate and remove the remaining mass of cells. We would set up a surgery date and-"

"No," I rasped "no more."

"But-But, Yugi it is imperative we do this otherwise the cancer will have an opportunity to re-grow!"

"No."

She just sat back in her chair mouth gaping at me. Dr. Goodrich spoke up.

"Of course you have every right to refuse, but please I beg you to reconsider."

I slumped in my chair and continued to shake my head. I just couldn't handle this anymore I didn't want to deal with it anymore. I thought this was over and now I they want me to do it all over again, not in a million years.

He sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. "All right, but we'll be here to discuss other options if your change your mind."

&&&

"Come on, Yugi, you've been on that couch for three days."

_And if I get my wish I'll be here for the rest of my life._

"Listen to Grandpa, Yugi."

I glanced up at Yami.

"The gang and I are going to the mall you should come with us."

I let my gaze fall back down to the couch. _They don't need me to hold them back. You go with them Yami they are your friends now and you deserve a full life. A life that I am never going to have._

"Come on, Yugi, at least look at me when I'm trying to help."

"I don't want help."

"Yugi, don't act like I am the enemy."

I buried my head under a cushion. _Go away please I don't want to deal with anyone right now._

"All right if you want to act childish."

He grabbed the pillow off of me and tried to pull me up and I snapped.

"Oh, just fuck off!"

That got the desired response and he backed up. I took the chance and made a mad dash for the door.

"You can't run forever, Yugi!"

Ignoring him I bolted out of the shop and just kept going. Buildings and people flew by and I kept focused on beating out the voices screaming in my head. Telling me how stupid I was to believe that I could do anything right by myself and that I deserved any kind of happiness. Eventually even those noises were drowned out by my heartbeat that pounded in my chest and slap of sneakers on the pavement. Falling into my old rhythm from running track I paced myself and made it to the outskirts of the city.

Finally I came to a small beach and stopped. I doubled over panting hard and red dots soon spattered the sand. Now I'd really gone and done it my body was still in no condition to be having such demands put on it.

After I'd had a moment to collect myself I began kicking myself for being an idiot. Some mature person I'd become Yami finally seemed like he wanted to have a real conversation with me and what did I do? Curse like a sailor and runaway like a little kid. Pathetic. No wonder he didn't want to do anything with me. I'm sure grandpa forced him to ask me to go with him today. It use to be so different, like it was when I had been here before with him. Up on the cliffs on the first day we had come back to Domino.

_We watched the sun set beneath the ocean waves. I sat between his legs and let his arms rest on my shoulders. It felt wonderful the whole atmosphere held the promise of bright perfect future where we would never be apart. _

"_I like it here, Yugi, it reminds me of home."_

"_I knew you would and I like it too."_

_I leaned back into his chest totally content to stay like this forever just me and him. _

I think that was the first I thought that I might feel something more for him. Now though I've realized that I hadn't loved Yami like I thought, but really the image I had of him. Of him as my protector, riding in on his white house to save the day, that would always be there shielding me from a lot of the cold realities of life. I saw how that was unfair to put him in that light just as he kept the image of me as a fragile doll that needed to be covered in bubble-wrap. We both had a vision of the way the other should be and now that we didn't turn out the way the other wanted we really have nothing in common. So was there anything left for me here?

I stared at the outcrop. It was high a good thirty feet. Sharp rocks and pounding waves at the bottom. The beach was not on a well traveled road. Something like a body probably wouldn't be found for weeks. _I wonder if it's all worth it._ No, no I promised myself I wouldn't think like that anymore. Still what was I going to do? It was a stupid question really I knew what I should be doing it was just a matter of getting myself to want to do it. But I was so tired. Physically, emotionally, mentally I was running on empty. I just wanted it all to go away I want to go away some place where life wasn't so difficult.

That was running away though and Yami was right I couldn't run forever, not from him and not from my problems. Throwing my life away to live on the couch wasn't going to change anything. It was time I got my act together and accepted the fact that the surgery was indeed the best option open to me. The longer I put it off the worse it would get. If only thinking about doing it and doing it were the same thing. Just thinking about going to that hospital had me almost paralyzed with fear at the thought of a very bleak outcome. All surgeries came with risks and what if this method to remove the cancer failed too? You would think I wouldn't be so scared to face my own mortality after everything I'd been through with the gang, but I was. It seemed so much more definite when it was surrounded by knifes and sterilized cloth then it had when maniacs were throwing paper cards around. It was a true possibility I knew that now and I couldn't deny it as I had before. Again I longed for Yami's companionship to hear his strong voice speak soothing words of comfort and encouragement in my time of weakness. I kicked myself once more for my uncalled for behaviour earlier. Another opportunity to confess lost.

Now it's not a matter of I can't talk to them it's that I don't want to talk to them. At this point it's so late in this game of deception that I know all I would get now is a lot of scolding for trying to hide something like this and thinking I could actually do something on my own. Like a five year old who had gotten into the cookie jar and didn't want to tell anyone about his stomach-ache fearing the punishments for breaking the rules. I truly was nothing more than a child.

I lay down on the sand, the water washed over me and soaked through my clothes. It reminded me of our trip to Egypt which felt like it had happened a lifetime ago. Life seemed so uncomplicated before that battle. I had won the match and he was supposed to move on, it should have been that simple, but it wasn't.

As he started to walk away I'd thrown myself at him and begged him to stay. Told him the duel was wrong and that I was nothing without him, and in doing so sealed my own doom. I had shown myself to be weak in the eyes of him and his friends. That day I became a tag-along. The little brother who followed them around hoping to be included, all the growth that I had gone through melted away in an instant.

Maybe I'd hurt him when I'd asked him to stay. Perhaps that was why he was so hateful towards me. I had torn him away from his friends and family, forced him to learn an entirely new way of living. Then my friends must have seen me as selfish for keeping him here because I was too much of a child to make it on my own and come to hate me as well.

Could I blame them though? I mean how would it make me feel if the tables were turned? If I had been sent back five thousand years to his time and forced to learn all of his customs, language, and everyday life. I probably would have felt betrayed too and have a hard time adjusting to things at first and would have needed a lot of help to learn about everything. I sat up as the light-bulb moment happened. Of course it all made sense! My friends had to have realized the difficulties and offered to help him. He would have accepted and not gone to me for aide because I was the one who put him here. It would have been like asking the jailer to help file down the bars. That was the starting point, it had to be, he hadn't wanted or needed my help and he had gone to them for the support and love I had denied him. So as time went on they found a life outside of me and learned to enjoy that world more than the one they had left behind. None of them neither Joey or Tristan or Téa and especially Yami needed me in their lives anymore.

It hurt, it hurt terribly. It always did when I thought about them about what we use to have and how far we had fallen from that wonderful friendship. Coming to grips with the fact that they didn't even seem to care about all that had been lost. Still now I understood why events had happened as they had and figuring out the final piece of the puzzle left me with some measure of comfort at least. I knew for sure now that when the inevitable happened they were going to be okay without me.

(End chapter 8)


	9. The Wondering Road

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu gi oh it is the property of Kazuki Takahashi

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu gi oh it is the property of Kazuki Takahashi.

Narration ()

The Quiet One: The Wondering Road

(It wasn't a very impressive building. It was small and plain and covered in white stucco. Yugi stood in front of it, a notebook and several pamphlets in his hands.)

Creepy that was the only way to describe this. There was simply no way to feel good about doing this. Still it needed to be done, no matter how much I didn't want to it, I had to have my affairs in order. I would not allow those left behind to deal with this. The surgery itself was already scheduled, less then a week from today, and although they told me everything would be fine I didn't take it to heart. After all they had said it before and look what had happened. So I continued making other arrangements, to ensure they'll do a bit more than toss my body in the woods.

With the decision made I went inside with all the anticipation of going for a root canal. The man who ran the place was pleasant enough, but far too enthusiastic about his job. Being shown caskets and told all there aspect as if I was buying a new car was just...wrong. Still I wandered around the room feeling more and more chilled at each casket I passed. Looking at the different linings I wondered how anyone decided what they would look best in. Some were soft satin white, others were baby blue. Many were made of dark sturdy wood with intricate carvings. Still more were plain lacking any intricate designs. I liked those ones best.

He left me alone to look at the tombstones _thank god. _If I had had him hovering over me while I looked at these as he had inside and I would run screaming down the street and never return. As I looked at the real state I wondered if there would be anything beyond this.

According to Yami the afterlife would be paradise where any comfort or desire was yours._ I wonder if there is a place like that for us peons. _ He was a pharaoh so of course he could expect nothing less than the best at the end of his life, but I was just an average person would such a place exist for me in the world beyond this one?

I wondered if the gang will come here after I was gone. They were acting weird again. They hadn't tried to include me, apparently they had enough of the meeting half way idea, but they had started looking at me, glancing really, out of the corner of their eyes and staring at me when they thought I wasn't looking tip-toeing around me like I was going to snap at any moment. Personally I would have liked them to go back to simply ignoring me at least then I could just feel hurt and angry rather than confused. I hadn't changed my attitude so why were they suddenly so freaked out by me? Maybe they've finally realized something is wrong with me and they want to fix it. They always liked to fix things. Bit late for that though.

I came to the end of the last row. The marker here was smaller, less grand, than the others. I knelt down and touched the white stone. It was rounded at the corners sat in the shade of a weeping willow tree. It was quiet here the sounds of the near by road didn't reach this far, it was peaceful too, the wind gently moved through the branches, the sun warmed the ground beneath my feet. I knew it was the right one.

&

With my decisions made I signed the necessary paperwork and headed home as fast as my legs would carry me. Dinner should have been a relaxing event after that, but I couldn't enjoy it. Yami and Grandpa were exchanged in conversation as I pushed around small portions of food wanting so much to just leave the table. I had no desire to hear the happy chit-chit of two men who had nothing more to worry about than tax returns and tomorrow's history assignment. It was also torture to be near all this food that looked so good and not being able to eat anything that wasn't liquid or drowning in gravy. Besides I didn't feel very hungry after spending the day picking out my own casket and burial plot.

"Yugi, I made that food for you to eat not push around your plate."

I cringed at his frosty tone. He was right I should at least try some of it. He had put a lot of time and effort into it and I should be respectful. I brought a fork full of meat slowly up to my mouth, I felt their eyes on me. I put into my mouth and chewed for a long time hoping to lessen the pain of swallowing. It didn't help much as the taste alone made me want to spit it back out. Eventually I swallowed. It scorched my throat, every piece grated against the inflamed sides. I fought against the gag reflex, grabbed my glass of milk and chugged it down, dowsing the fire.

Grandpa sighed. "Yugi, there are much better ways to let me know you don't like my cooking."

With that they began cleaning up the table I picked my plate and started to carry it into the kitchen. _I can't do anything right can I?_

Putting the dishes on the counter I went to the sink and began to fill it with water.

"Yugi, what are those?" Yami asked.

I looked down and saw that my shirt sleeve had rode up so the bruises on my arm could be seen. Before I could even think up a response he grabbed my shirt and pushed it up the rest of the way revealing a pattern of purple splotches most of which hadn't even begun to heal.

"Oh, Yugi why can't you stand up for yourself?"

_How? _I wanted to scream at him _tell me how, Yami. How do I communicate when most of the time I am unable to speak, with our mind link broken beyond repair, when no one understands sign language and when nobody in this family will look at me long enough for me to write anything down! _

I felt the sting of tears of frustration as they formed in my eyes.

"And why must you always start crying gods, Yugi, don't be such a child!"

He lips kept moving but I heard nothing, all I saw was red. _How dare he call me that!_ I pushed past him not wanting to hear anymore of his insulting advice. Grandpa's response followed me up the stairs.

"I don't know what I'm going to do with him."

I ran into the bathroom slammed the door and locked it firmly behind me. I slammed my hand down on the counter and kicked the trash can_. I hate you, you self-centered arrogant ugh! _ _You should save you advice for someone who will actually be able to use it! In a week's time you're going to be talking to a slab of marble. Besides it wasn't bullies that caused these bruises and if you just looked at my routine for a day you'd know that._

I splashed cold water on my face and tried to calm down. Why was I letting this get to me yet again? It was almost over their opinions shouldn't even register on my radar anymore. I knew why they did though, for the same reason their words always mattered, they were my family and I wanted them to be happy. If they were angry with me than they weren't happy and I just wanted these last few days to be peaceful and nice and the way it used to be.

Sighing in aggravation I took off my shirt and gently moved my hands over the catcher checking for any damage. I could see the finger marks from where he grabbed were already turning a dark purple. _That's going to leave a nasty mark._ Still it didn't appear that any serious damage had happened. Removing the familiar cap, I ran my fingers over it. Everything seemed fine thankfully. I stared at my reflection in the mirror. Personally I think, if it's even possible, that I actually look worse after sometime recovering from treatment than I did during it. I was so skinny I could almost see my ribs, my skin was pale expect on my neck where it was still burnt a bright red. I looked tired and run down. I ran my fingers over my hair if you could call it that. It felt slightly like peach fuzz and was only slightly longer than that. It was totally black not a speck of red or yellow could be seen. It was fitting really given my bleak mood. That was probably the reason my former friends were antsy around me. I had ditched the hat, they had yelled in disbelieve of course, and they were probably angry that I dare change something about myself without their permission. I am not just some doll then can dress up and play with only when they feel like it.

I grimaced at my reflection one last time. Satisfied that I'd completely depressed myself for the evening I left the bathroom. Back in my own room, sat down at my desk, and took out a fresh piece of paper. Smoothing out the edges I took a deep breath and grabbed a sharp pencil. I had some last minute things to tie up before the final day.

(End chapter 9)


	10. Haunting

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu gi oh it is all the property of Kazuki Takahashi.

Narration ()

The Quiet One: Haunting 

(Yugi stood on the school roof his body pressed hard against the fence and looked out over the city, as the sun sunk lower in the sky.)

It seemed so unreal that I was looking at my final sunset. Tomorrow was really it. The day that marked the end of everything I had known and would begin my entry into the unknown. And I was scared to death. I could mix paint I was shaking so bad with fear. Oh how I wanted my friends, _Yami's_, Yami's friends I remind myself those people I'm supposed to be mad at remember? I sighed and turned around to face a very familiar wall. Had we really sat here once, only worried about Pegasus and his plans? It seemed like a lifetime ago that we had all fought for our loved ones at Duelist Kingdom.

"_It's too bad you can't come with me to rescue grandpa."_

"_Don't worry somehow someway will do it together."_

"_Together?"_

"_You bet we're a team, Yugi."_

They had done so much then were willingly to give up anything and everything to help me. Even after all this time it still felt strange that they weren't here. Not that I had been completely alone today Seto had insisted that he double check absolutely everything and Mokuba had done his best to fill the day with every fun event he could think of within such a short period , it had been wonderful if exhausting. It really had been a great day I just wish they had been there too, just to be able to say goodbye.

I took the scenic route home and everywhere I went I was surrounded by memories. I relaxed at let it all come back to me. The pier where I had saved Joey when he had been possessed by Marik, friendship had won the day.

"_This time Joey's gonna be the one doing the rescuing!"_

I passed by the Duelling centre where Rebecca had battled me for Grandpa's blue Eyes card.

"_And I'm not yelling at you!"_

That little stationary store where Tea had bought each one us diaries insisting that,

"_No one is going to believe all this stuff we've so we have to write it all down."_

I laughed when I remembered the fit she had thrown when she'd found Joey and Tristan making paper airplanes out of the pages in theirs a week later.

Walking in the front door I remembered how much I use to enjoy coming home how grandpa always had an ear for anything that was on my mind. The many times we had played Duel Monsters or other games when business was slow.

I stood in the living room, where it had all begun. The couch was empty now, but I could still see that night we had all been crowded around the TV waiting to see the outcome of the Regional championship between Rex and Weevil.

"_You see it's true what they say you snooze you lose."_

It was easier then, simpler then oh, well people always said life wasn't fair.

I went upstairs ready to try and sleep so I could look marginally presentable in the morning. Not to mention it would be a really good idea to actually be on time for the operation. I was stopped as Grandpa came out of his room.

"Yugi I'd like to talk to you."

I stood by my door and waited.

"Yugi, what has gotten into you lately? You don't talk to me, you're never around when I need, and you got that ridiculous haircut and those clothes I mean just look at you."

I cringed, suddenly self-conscious of my clothes that now hung off me, what was the point of buying ones that actually fit this late in the game anyway? I rubbed my hand across the top of my head letting my gaze drop to inspect the floor. He didn't mean to truly hurt me he didn't know.

"Yugi, look at me when I'm talking to you."

A small flame of anger built up inside me when he said that only to be snuffed out as looked at him again. He had raised me taught me everything I knew about duel monsters gave me his deck, he really loved me once, how could I hate him? And besides by tomorrow he would no longer have to deal with me and could focus on Yami and all his accomplishments, none of this really mattered anyway. So I just slowly looked him over as he scolded me, taking in every crease in his skin, every grey hair. I committed it all to memory, for the last time.

"Yugi, are you even listening to me?"

I hugged him and breathed in the heavy sent of that honey-lemon tea he liked to drink so much, and felt the rough fabric of his overalls against my cheek.

'I love you' I signed and went to my room.

&

I sat on my bed going over my checklist in my head trying to think of anything I'd forgotten to do. I turned as someone knocked. Yami poked his head into the room.

"Yugi, we need to talk."

_Why is everyone suddenly so chatty today?_

As he sat down on my bed I felt the familiar tickle in the back of my throat. My cough was hacking and rough, though thankfully it was dry, so I was at least saved the embarrassment of losing body fluids in front of him. As I finished he looked at me his brow furrowed in concern. I'd never realized, until just now, how much I'd missed that look. I felt his arm drape around my shoulders. I stiffened not use to such contact from him. Still I lacked the strength or the will to struggle against it.

"Are you all right?"

_No._

He sighed. "You know, Yugi, I can help you if something is bothering you, but I can't if you don't tell me things."

_There's nothing you can do. _

"Have I done something to upset you?"

_No you haven't done anything that's the problem._

"At least answer me, Yugi."

Looking into his eyes all I saw was sincerity. He still really wanted to know what was wrong with me and if I revealed it all I could have some sense of closure with him. I steeled myself if ever I wanted to tell him now was the only time. I opened my mouth ready to spill everything and all that came out was a half-hearted wheeze. _Not again. _Once again the choice to act had been taken from me.

_What good would telling him really have done anyway? It wouldn't change anything. It's too late to change anything. _

"I don't understand why you have to be so stubborn, but if that is how you want to be then fine." He made to leave.

No! I couldn't let my last moments with him be filled with anger and misunderstandings. So in a moment of blind panic I did the only thing I could think of, I kissed him. My hands firmly on his shoulders I spun him back towards me and pressed my lips gently to his.

It was soft and warm and-and…wrong. Why wasn't this the happiest moment of my life? I was kissing my crush, I was doing something I'd wanted to do before I died. Why wasn't it how I dreamed it would be? The glass that had separated me and him for so long had finally melted away. He was mine to touch and taste, the beautiful display was all mine…and suddenly I didn't want it. We broke apart. He just looked at me in shock.

"Yes-well…uh just-just keep in mind what I said, Yugi."

With that he turned around and quickly left my room. I stared at the door as silent tears ran down my face.

_You're too late, Yami, you're just too late._

&

The morning was cold and grey. I yawned having gotten far too little sleep the night before. Most of the night had been spent staring at the ceiling failing miserably at trying to relax. Groaning I rolled out of bed and began to look for my clothes.

After getting dressed I took off the key from my neck and put in an envelope on the desk. Making sure it and the other letters were in a spot he couldn't miss. Then I picked a bag of things the hospital said I should have even though I knew I wouldn't need them and left my room.

As quietly as I could I quickly checked on Yami and Grandpa both sound asleep without a care in the world. I smiled softly, content with the knowledge that I had made the right choice, they were going to be okay. I made my way downstairs and out the front door. I looked up at my home one last time, scrubbed my eyes with my sleeve to hold down the tears, and I started down the street. I had planned to take the bus down, but I was so caught up in my thoughts and everything around me that I ended up walking the entire way.

Actually preparing for the operation past in a blur. Somehow I checked in, put me things in a room, and was wheeled into surgery. This was it. It was all over. I tensed as they put the mask on my face.

"Just relax, and take a few deep breaths everything will be just fine."

(End chapter 10)


	11. Gently into That Good Night

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu gi oh it is the property of Kazuki Takahashi.

Narration ()

The Quiet One: Gently into that Good Night 

(The sun had come up quickly as Yami got dressed clearing away the chill and the grey clouds of the early morning. Cheered by the nice weather and eager to meet the others he walked quickly past Yugi's door that was still shut tight.)

At the top of the stairs I stopped and turned back and decided to check on Yugi. If last night was any indication he was coming down sick and I should look in on him. He had been out of sorts lately, to put it mildly, perhaps that accounted for some of his behaviour and if not maybe now he was even ready to talk about whatever else was bothering him.

I knocked on the door.

"Yugi?"

No answer.

I knocked again. "Yugi?"

Still nothing, carefully I turned the knob in case Yugi was asleep and hadn't heard me. I went into his room only to find it empty, the radio had been left on I noticed. I shrugged _he must have left already. _He must have been better than I thought. It wasn't such an odd thing, in fact it was rare that he was home when we got up. I turned to leave, but something in the room compelled me to stay. I couldn't put my finger on it, but something about the place was different. It took a minute before I realized it was not one, but several things that stood out. The last time I had been in Yugi's room, _when was that? _There had been games and puzzles all over the floor, school papers had been scattered on and around the desk, and clothes piled in the back of the closet. It looked lived in, but now…The bed cover was perfectly fitted in all corners, the pillow smooth. The floor was completely clear; and looked like it had been recently washed. Clothes hung straight and neat on their hangers, textbooks stood in alphabetical order on the desk; a large stack of papers beside them, and the puzzles and games all sat in labelled boxes on the closet floor. It was too neat, too sterile. Almost as if he had never been here.

I went over to the desk suddenly very curious as to why his room looked like it did. I flipped through the pile of papers. They were all of our tests and recent assignments, and his marks were excellent. I had no idea he was doing so well I would have to congratulate him if I could figure out where he went. It was then spotted an envelope with my name on it. I opened it to find two letters one was barely a page long the other considerably longer.

_Dear Yami, _

_Sorry about the mess, but you know me and my room or at least you did. If you read the Will first don't worry I haven't gone to throw myself off a bridge or under a train or anything drastic like that, it's just my time I guess. Of course if they told you about me before you read either letter then I guess that whole last sentence is moot. Anyway I just wanted to say goodbye and tell you that I'm sorry for everything I've done and for all that I've left undone. I know I didn't raise enough money at the end to cover all the expenses and I'm sorry to burden you both with what's left, but I want you to know that I tried and that I left my uniform for Duke in the top dresser drawer. You know I'm going to try to hold to my best memories of you I hope you do the same for me. I still cherish everything we did together. Oh, and about that kiss don't think too much on it okay? I just had to know what it felt like and it was now or never. Take care of Grandpa for me he deserves a grandson like you. _

_Goodbye,_

_Yugi_

What was going on with Yugi? Why would he ever write something like that? A grandson like me? Honestly it was like he thought Grandpa didn't love him anymore after I had spent so long trying to live up to the example he had set. And what expenses? What was this about Duke? Had he gotten a job? Well that would explain why he was never had time to be at home, but Grandpa would be mad when he found out and if he had one why was he writing about not having enough money. Enough money for what? _What the hell is going on here!?_

I quickly opened up the thicker letter hoping it would give me more answers. The minute I read the first line I began to wish I'd left it alone.

_I Yugi being of sound mind and uncooperative body do here by decree this to be my last will and testament. _

He listed everything he owned to everyone. He left his duelling deck to Joey. Some boy named Ethan was to receive several games and puzzles. To Tea he left an old Gameboy wishing her well on her dreams. Trinkets and posters; even Grandpa got the old box the puzzle had once been kept in. Then there was me…

_To Yami Mutou I bequeath to you what is rightfully yours. The millennium puzzle I'm sorry I can no longer protect it as I promised, but I know you will be able to do it without me. I just wanted to let you know that it has been a privilege to serve as your light. I wish every one of you all the happiness in the world in my absence. This concludes my last will and testament._

The bottom once again held Yugi's scratchy signature and there was another one that I could make out as Kaiba's as a witness. But that meant that Kaiba knew about all of this. Why hadn't he said anything! Even he wouldn't be that heartless.

I turned the paper over looking for something else anything else. _Yugi tell me this some sort of elaborate joke. _How could I not see any of this? Why hadn't he told me I mean the link alone should have-of course the link! I could contact him though that!

//Yugi?//

Nothing everything was blank.

//Yugi?//

Why wouldn't he answer?!

//Yugi, please can you hear me?//

I tried to reach out further hoping I could sense his soul only to find it was like pushing against a wall of darkness.

//Yugi!//

I tore through the envelope again in desperation hoping to find some sign of where he was. A key fell out this time and I stared at it for a moment wondering what on earth it went to until I spotted a lock on one of the desk drawers. I opened the drawer to find the puzzle intact and polished. A photo album lay underneath it. Carefully I picked it up and held in my hands in defeat. If he hadn't taken it with him then, then I couldn't contact him. I bowed my head letting my forehead touch the cool metal. _If all this is true then it doesn't really matter if he wears it is it? _This couldn't really be happening. He, he couldn't be gone. _Yugi where are you?_

The radio played on in the background as the enormity of the situation finally began to truly sink in.

Cut my hair the way you wanted

Watched you become important

Quit my job to make our new home far away

Now you're Mr. Successful and I'm queen of the treadmill

Trying to stay the size you think that I should stay

I use to dream about what I would be

Last night I dreamed about a washing machine

Now you say I'm being silly

But you don't know me really

You never take the time to ask me how I feel

I keep the check book balanced

I decorate your palace

You know I use to think that you were king

Somewhere down deep I know you really love me

But you can't see that what we have is not all I need

You try to tell me I'm not being fair to you

But life's too short for a selfish attitude

I keep on giving but I can't stop living

A woman needs a little something of her own

I like happy endings

I don't like depending

I keep right on pretending

But I can't do that anymore

I can't do that anymore.

(End Chapter 11)


	12. The Last Ones to Know

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu gi oh it is the property of Kazuki Takahashi.

Narration ()

The Quiet One: The Last Ones to Know 

(The sun was beating down hard in a cloudless blue sky as it approached mid-day. The pavement seemed to melting in the heat as Seto Kaiba pulled his bright red spots car into the school parking lot.)

"Stay here, Mokuba, I won't be long," I said stepping out of the car and heading inside.

There were no classes scheduled for today but many students and facility were here for the monthly soccer game and so I walked up to our classroom knowing she would be there. I knocked on the door.

"Mrs. Walters, may I come in?"

"Mr. Kaiba, what brings you here today?"

"I want to pick up Yugi Mutou's work for the next week. I know that you know he will be absent."

"Yugi Mutou? Mr. Kaiba, you are aware that he-"

"Yes I am aware, may I have his work?"

She looked at me curiously before reaching into her desk and handing over a folder.

"You seem to be holding out a lot of optimism about this, Mr. Kaiba."

"Someone has to," I answered and then thanking her curtly I turned on my heel and quickly left the room eager to have this task over with. Unfortunately I had the misfortune to pass Yami's gang of cheerleaders as they came through the front doors.

"Kaiba, what are you doing here?"

"None of your business," I said pushing past them.

"Nice to see you too."

I turned back to glare at Téa only to be cut off as Mr. Russell ran up behind me.

"Has anybody seen Mutou!?"

"No, Mr. Russell, why?"

"Typical he'll go out for track, an activity that requires no concentration at all, but now that we could use him for a real sport well the wimp simply can't be bothered. Should have known he wouldn't show the spineless little bottom feeder-"

A crack echoed across the schoolyard. I stood with my fist in the air Mr. Russell now holding his cheek that would be spotting a large brush by tomorrow.

"Listen and listen well if I ever here you talk about him like that again I will do more than hit you I promise you that."

_Calm down _I thought_ he isn't worth my time. _Having had be fill of moronic interaction for the day, which was no doubt the reason I had overacted to such a stupid statement about a guy I don't even like, I walked towards the parking lot and smirked at those losers stood there with their jaws hanging on the floor. Old iron fist must have gotten has his nerve back because he started running after me and yelling.

"I'll have you expelled for this! I'll press charges! I'll sue you for all you got!"

"Don't burst a blood vessel doing it." I quipped and he huffed and stormed away.

"Wow, Kaiba, way to give it to the man!"

"Go chew on a bone, mutt."

"Don't call me a mutt, moneybags! I'm agreeing with you!"

"You're right it's too good for you, at least a mutt is loyal."

"What are you talking about, Kaiba?!"

I turned around.

"Yugi of course. I didn't see any of you jumping to his defence just now."

"You're nuts we care about Yugi. We've been nothing, but loyal to him!"

I laughed. "If you truly believe that than you are even dumber and more oblivious than I thought."

"Kaiba, you should be ashamed of yourself we care about Yugi like friends should-"

"Don't you dare lecture me on friendship when you don't even know the meaning of the word."

"You're a real piece of work, you know that?"

I smirked at Tristan. "I know. But then you agree that ignoring and insulting someone is what true friendship is all about?"

"We would never-"

"Never what? Leave him out, inadvertently hurt his feelings, over-look something crucial while being blinded by the wonder that is his so-called alter-ego?"

"That was fixed! We were out with him just-just…" Tristan trailed off trying to think of their last outing and obviously coming up empty.

"It doesn't matter they don't both always have to come with us they're practically the same person!"

"Oh, right they're the same person even though they each have there own body their own interests and their own lives."

"Yugi wouldn't like that stuff anyway. He's-"

"The same age as the rest of us."

"Different," Téa finished.

"We know he doesn't want to do half this stuff because the last time we did he never said anything to us and always left early."

"Because he couldn't have had something on his mind of course, and Yami is much cooler and fun to have around than him."

"We've just been making sure Yami is adjusting to his new life and fitting in with us. Yugi knows that."

"Really?" I questioned leaning back against my car. "Interesting that you claim to know Yugi's every thought yet you just admitted to not having spent any time with him."

"We know because, Yugi, is our friend and he'd tell us if there was something going on!"

"Oh, he would, would he? Okay then, where has Yugi been going every weekday at four? Where has he spent his Saturday mornings for the last two months? Why does he always wear a hat?"

They shuffled their feet and looked at the ground.

"Can't answer? I thought as much."

"Since when do you become such an expert on our friend?"

"That is also none of your business."

I turned around and began to open the door only to have that stupid mutt slam it closed again.

"Well since he is _our_ best friend that makes it our business, rich boy, and since you're so sure you know something we don't just spill it why don't ya?!"

"He has cancer he went to the hospital today to have it removed. Now step away from my car or I won't hesitate to hit you with it."

They all finally backed away once more in shock and I quickly slipped back into my car drove out of the parking lot and down the street.

"Wow you like-like Yugi even more than I thought big bro," Mokuba said as he rolled down the window.

"I don't like him, Mokuba, or like-like him as you so aptly put it."

"Sure you do that's why you defended him just now and why you stayed up all night with him when he stayed with us. Come on, Seto, you don't even do that for me anymore and I'm family."

"Those were special circumstances."

"Special circumstances or a special person?"

I didn't answer and instead glared at the back of the car in front of us as we stopped at a red light. He was not special, he was not family, he was a rival. A friendly rival of course that I was merely helping because he needed it. If he fell behind in work, if he didn't recover fully from this well…that was simply unacceptable! I would have to go back to interacting with Yami if I wanted a challenge and he wasn't nearly as handsome-interesting! As Yugi was. That was all. There was nothing else between us, I wouldn't let there be anything else, I was my own man with my own life and I controlled everything in it. Especially who I let get close to me.

The light changed and I shifted gears and pushed the car faster down the road. Knowing that the sooner we got to the hospital and found out that everything was okay, and it was going to be okay it had to, the faster things would get back to normal.

(End chapter 12)


	13. Real Life Hurts

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu gi oh it is the property of Kazuki Takahashi.

Narration: ()

The Quiet One: Real Life Hurts 

(The taxi came to a stop outside the hospital and Yami dashed out of the car not even bothering to close the door.)

I ran inside the building, not even waiting for Grandpa, and began looking frantically around for an information desk. My partner was alone, sick possibly- no I wouldn't even think about it, it couldn't be. I wouldn't let it be.

"Yugi Mutou," I panted practically throwing myself against the first desk I found.

"Excuse me?"

"Yugi Mutou is he here?"

"Are you family?"

"Yes."

"Mutou with an M?"

"Of course Mutou with an M what letter do you think that starts with!"

"Sir, please calm down I am just doing my job. Do you have any form of identification?"

"Why would I need that?"

"Sir, I am not going to let just anyone see any patient for any reason especially not with the way you are acting."

"He's with me," Grandpa send coming to my defence and handed over a small plastic card to the lady.

She checked the card over and began what seemed like an eternity clicking on her keyboard. "Oh, yes, Mr. Mutou, he just came out of surgery. He is in room 415 on the fourth floor. He probably won't be awake yet and I need you both to be aware of the other patients that are also in recovery and act appropriately." She looked squarely at me with that last statement. I simply nodded gruffly and walked as fast as a dared to the elevator.

On the way up I let the girl's words sink in fully. _They said he was released from surgery that has to be good right? Right? _

We found the room easily enough, but at the door I was hesitant as I turned the knob afraid of what I would see on the other side. The room was dark two white lights shone over top of the two beds in the room. He lay on the one closest to the window looking like a corpse. A tube was attached to his arm another tube entered his nose. A large bandage was covering his neck expect from one spot where some sort of plastic tube was sticking out. The hospital gown was loose on him revealing skin below the bandage that was bright red if I didn't know any better I'd think it was burned. His arms were black and blue and the short blue gown again did nothing to hide his stick man frame. _When was the last time he ate?_ I thought back to all the recent dinners where he sat there touching nothing how we forced him to eat and how he looked like he wanted to spit out every bite.

Cautiously I went over and gently shook his shoulder. "Yugi?" He didn't move. I reached up and touched the soft peach fuzz like hair on his head. He had never said what was wrong with him, but seeing him now without the baggy sweaters and scarves and hats to hide the truth I knew what he had, how had he managed to deal with it alone? I should have been there, _but isn't this what you wanted? _The annoying voice was back again and I tried not to focus on it now was not the time to think about that.

"What do we do?" I asked.

Grandpa pulled over a chair and sat down beside the bed. "We wait."

I nodded and sat down on the other unoccupied bed in the room. //Yugi?// I called again hoping that being so close to him now would allow some sort of connection to come back, help him wake up sooner, but the link remained silent. I turned to look behind me as two shadows suddenly fell over the doorway.

"Oh, goody more social interaction."

"What are you doing here, Kaiba?"

"Not that's it's any of your business, but I came to give Yugi his work," he said going over to the small table in the corner of the room and laying a folder on top of it.

"Why do you think he would want that?"

"He takes his education seriously. I knew he would want to have it."

"How would you know that? Or better how did know about, Yugi? Why would he want anything to do with you?"

"Hey, my brother didn't come here to be badgered by you!"

Kaiba put up his hand to silence Mokuba.

"I was under the impression that I was the only one who knew about this situation."

"Not anymore."

"Nice to see. And just to let you know your little band of cheerleaders have been informed of this and no doubt they'll be here shortly."

As if on cue the gang arrived practically shoving each other through the door.

"Is he?" Joey asked first.

"He hasn't woken up yet."

"Why didn't you tell us?!" Téa shouted.

"I, I didn't know."

"But you're his partner he tells you everything!"

"Not this."

"Then how come you got here before us?" Tristan asked.

"He left a note. A note! As if that explains anything!"

This had obviously been going on for weeks months even and he thought a one page note just did away with it all. _What the hell had he been thinking!_

Téa walked up to the bed and looked at him blinking away tears. "What kind of friends are we to let him go through this alone?"

"You're not."

"What did you just say, Kaiba?"

"You're not his friends."

I balled my hands into fists resisting the urge to punch him. Kaiba was wrong we were his friends. I tried to keep him involved in my life! He had done nothing, but push me away! I had asked him about what was wrong just last night and he hadn't said anything! Not one word that something this serious was going on he had just, just kissed me. I reached up and touched my lips remembering the feeling. It had been nothing, but shocking at the time, but now thinking back on it seemed so final it was his way of saying goodbye. I sighed he had cared and it was I who had done nothing.

"I can't believe he didn't tell us," Tristan said as he held Joey down firmly in the other chair to keep him away from Kaiba.

I thought back to everything that he seemed so off about recently. The lack of appetite, all those mornings he was gone before I got up. I glanced back up and the bandage on his throat and fought to keep from shuddering, the silence it all made sense. The signs were all there I had just been too selfish to look at them.

"Yes he did we just didn't pay attention."

"How did we not know?"

"It's called being an idiot. It's obviously highly contagious you should have been quarantined, Wheeler."

"That's it! Why don't you put your money where your mouth is, rich-boy!"

"Sit down, Joseph!"

Everybody jumped at the outburst. I looked over to see Grandpa with tears in his eyes and suddenly looking older than I ever could have imagined. Téa came over and put a hand on his shoulder.

"Are you all right Mr. Mutou?"

"No, how can you even ask me that?" He smiled sadly and stroked Yugi's hand. "I, I had always had it so easy with Yugi for so long. He never stayed out late at night was always ready to lend a hand around the shop if I ever asked. He wasn't a perfect student, but he worked hard. I've raised children and I know how teenagers can be when he started becoming more withdrawn and sullen I thought he was just rebelling not wanting to share everything in his life like he use to. Simply becoming a true teenager I never thought it was something so serious I never realized that I had ignored him, with helping Yami, to the point where he didn't feel he could trust me with this! I didn't want to push him I wanted to let him grow on his own. I was so proud of him."

"And when was the last time you told him that?"

He sank back into the chair at Kaiba's accusation looking defeated.

"Out of sight, out of mind isn't it old man?"

"Kaiba, that's enough!"

"He was with you wasn't he?" Grandpa asked.

"When?"

"That weekend he wasn't home he stayed with you didn't he?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"He had an infection. It wasn't serious, but I knew that you dweebs didn't know anything was wrong with him and wouldn't treat the situation with the care he-it deserved. So I did it for you."

"Well no one asked you to! You got that, Kaiba! You're not his friend! You're not the boss of any of this! You're nothing! Why are you even here?!"

"For once you're right, Wheeler, I shouldn't be here sharing air with a bunch self-minded, short-sighted fools. Let's go, Mokuba."

He left at last and I sunk lower on the bed deflated. It hurt to hear those harsh blunt insults. But what hurt most of all was that he was right. We, the ones who talk about friendship and being there for one another, had completely deserted one of our own in his time of greatest need, and we had never even noticed! Truly it scared me how easy it had been for it to all just fall apart.

(End chapter 13)


	14. Endless Night

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu gi oh it is the property of Kazuki Takahashi.

Narration: ()

The Quiet One: Endless Night 

(Night had descended on Domino. The hospital room was dark as Yami leaned over the bed waiting and watching for any sign of movement.)

He didn't wake up. Not one sign of life had appeared for the entire day. Eventually Grandpa had gone home probably to deal with the mess I'd made in Yugi's room tearing apart his desk before finding the papers that told me where he was. Téa went to help him. Joey and Tristan, after much shouting at the nurses over the length of visiting hours, finally left when we all agreed there was nothing more they could do here and that I would call the moment anything changed. The nurses had tried to get me out as well after that, but I had refused to move saying that someone had to be here in case he woke up to tell the others. They had said they would keep checking on him, but I insisted. On some level I knew I was being selfish because when he woke up I wanted to be the first one he saw. On the other hand I knew I hadn't been there for him before, but I was going to do it now even if he wasn't aware of it and eventually, and thankfully, the hospital staff stopped asking me to leave.

&&&

The next morning the only change was that I was the one ready to close my eyes and never open them again. Grandpa came back in early telling me the others would be here in an hour and just look at my state of exhaustion in sympathy.

"One of us could take over for you. You should get out and sleep in a proper bed."

"What if he wakes up for two minutes and I'm not here? If he wakes up and I'm not here-if he finds himself alone again I will never forgive myself."

Grandpa simply nodded and took a seat in his chair as I continued to berate myself. What kind of guardian was I to let him face this alone? To never question anything to just condemn and berate him like a mere child. How could I have not known something was wrong? He was my light, my charge, my responsibility and I had turned a blind eye to all of this.

In some ways I was selfish I see that now. I so focused on my life and my adjustments that I didn't think Yugi might need that too. Our friends had been so concerned about making sure I was all right with the world and understood how it all worked. It was nice all the attention, of course it wasn't like I truly needed it. One couldn't go as long as I had connected to Yugi and not pick up at least something about the times in which he lived. Still I'd be lying if I said I didn't enjoy it. Frankly I had been worried that they wouldn't accept me, that somehow with me separate from Yugi it would all be different with our friends and to my surprise it wasn't. They had accepted me with open arms into the group. I never thought that by becoming a part of the group I was squeezing Yugi out. It wasn't supposed to happen like this! He was supposed to be stronger, but I was supposed to know if anything serious was going on! I should have been paying attention, he should have told me, and none should have happened. Forget that he had gone through this alone, but Yugi was the most wonderful, innocent person I had ever known he didn't deserve to go through it at all.

At the moment one of the nurses came in to check on him looking at the machines taking samples and then pulling something from the wall and placing it over his face.

"What is that?"

"An oxygen mask."

"Is he in danger?"

"No, this is not unusual the tissues around the area have flared up making it more difficult for him to breathe properly and the mask will help him."

After that it seemed to be nothing but a constant parade of visitors. The gang all returned and were kind enough to bring food from the cafeteria with them. The nest surprise though was when a man and woman came in holding a young boy. The mother told the boy that Yugi was sleeping and to be careful while making different movements with her hands. I leaned over and whispered to Grandpa, "who is he?"

"I don't know I've never seen the boy before."

I sat back and noticed the boy was holding Yugi's other hand and glaring at me from the other side of the bed.

"Sorry?"

"Don't be he gets like that when he feels left out you see he can't read your lips if you don't look at him."

"He can't hear?"

"He is deaf yes. Yugi has been working with him for a long time now and, Ethan, wanted to make sure he was okay."

Yugi had been working with him? Why hadn't he said anything? I knew why it was just something else on the long list of things I never bothered to talk to him about.

After they left yet another doctor came in to discuss Yugi's prognosis.

"You were unaware of his condition?" the doctor asked surprised when learned how ill informed we all were about anything to do with treatment schedules, therapies, and something about cell grades.

"Yes. He didn't want to burden us with it that much I guess."

"Well I can discuss everything in more detail as required, but that information is for family only. I'm sorry the rest of you will have to wait outside."

"We would wish for them to be here for this, if none of you mind?"

The gang nodded that they wished to stay and the doctor continued.

"These last few tests have shown that the tumour was successfully removed. The CAT scan showed no abnormalities or cancerous growths elsewhere. There's a six chance in ten it won't come back again and-"

"That's bogus Doc!"

"Yeah, our little buddy has to have better odds than that!"

"I assure you gentlemen that those are very good odds indeed for someone whose cancer was quite advanced."

"If those are such wonderful odds why is he not awake yet?"

"It is unusual that he woken up yet I agree, but it does happen on rare occasions. Sometimes when the body goes through a traumatic event the brain shuts down so it doesn't have to deal with everything."

"Like a coma?"

"No he is not. I'm sorry it is difficult to explain. When he does wake up though notify one of the nurses immediately we will wish to discuss this further with him."

He left and the room was silent for a moment.

"I don't know about the resta ya, but I'm tired of just sitting around doing nothing."

"So what do you suggest we do genius yell in his ear real loud?"

"What about you, Yami?"

I turned my head to look at Grandpa surprised by his question.

"Could you do something to help him?"

"Yeah, you two share that mind meld thingy don't you? So you can go to him rather than him coming to us right?" Téa asked letting a small amount of hope lingering her voice.

They were all looking at me now expectantly. They were relaying on me, trusting me to fix things as I had done so many times in the past. I didn't have the heart to tell then that the link was still closed and if it was being caused by Yugi intentionally, as I was beginning to suspect, there was little I could do to fix it.

"I can try," I said thinking that once I was inside perhaps I could do something after all. The hope was dim I knew that, but I would give anything to look into his eyes one more time. I removed the puzzle from my own neck and placed it around Yugi's.

"Good luck and be careful."

"I will."

I closed my eyes and concentrated in a moment I found myself within the cryptic maze of my mind. I ran down the passageways and spotted the door to the outside I pulled it open started to go out-and threw myself backwards. Falling ungraciously to the floor I just stared wide eyed at the obstacle that lay before me. Where there had once been a hallway connecting our two soulrooms there was now nothing, but a giant chasm.

(End chapter 14)


	15. Learning Curve

Welcome to the new chapter! Where Yugi gets to yell at Yami, a lot, enjoy.

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu gi oh it is the property of Kazuki Takahashi.

Narration ()

The Quiet One: Learning Curve

(Yami slowly got up from where he had fallen. Staring at the obstacle and at the door on the other side that now looked like it was a million miles away.)

_It's not possible! How could it all just disappear? _Not even Yugi if he was blocking with all his mental strength could he create such destruction. I had to know what had happened. Cautiously I looked off the edge I only had one chance to do this if I fell in then I would be as lost as Yugi was and we didn't need two people beyond the reach of the real world. I looked back up and focused my sight on the slight ledge on the other side. Backing up slowly I aimed for it. Taking a deep breath I ran towards the edge and jumped.

I slammed into the other side, air knocked out of me, I struggled to find some footing. The ledge was quickly crumbling away and I eventually grabbed the edge of Yugi's door which thankfully was still open. I pulled myself up and crawled into Yugi's soulroom. My relief at making it over was short lived as I looked up and gasped in shock once again. The room was nothing like I remembered it. It was murky covered in a mist and within that mist swirled bits of memories, memories of isolation, pain, and sorrow.

"_Yugi, I know you must be having a bad day but that is no reason for you to behave like this. I expected better from you as my other-half."_

"_The cancer has not gone into full remission as we originally hoped."_

"_I don't know what I'm going to do with him."_

"_Just relax, and take a few deep breaths everything will be just fine." _

I wandered through the mist trying to find some sign of Yugi as the memories kept Finally deep inside the mist when I felt I couldn't take anymore it cleared for a moment and I saw a door. A door that was deep brown against a wall of white. I steeled myself for whatever I might find beyond it and grabbed the handle. Pulling the door open I stepped inside and found Yugi lying there in the middle of the room on a long white block. I began to run towards him elated that he was still here. His head turned towards me, his eyes hard, I stopped cold.

"What are you doing here?"

"I-I am sorry, I'm just, just so sorry."

"Why should you apologize I didn't tell you about it?"

"Yes you did with ever early morning, absent Saturday, and silence you told me something wasn't right, but I didn't listen for that I apologize."

He turned his eyes back up towards the non-existent ceiling.

"Why are you here, Yami?"

"I came to bring you back."

"Bring me back to what?"

"To your friends and your family you're needed there."

He scoffed, "no one needs me."

"Don't say that, Yugi, we all need you, I need you."

"You! You need me least out of anyone."

"What about that boy Ethan, that is his name right?"

"He is five years old, Yami, he'll find someone else to idolize."

Obviously simply being up front about it wasn't going to work. I decided to try a different approach.

"I'm worried about you, Yugi."

"Since when was my welfare any concern of yours?"

"Always."

He got up then, enraged.

"Oh, so all those times you went out with the gang and left me at home, or ignored me when I wanted to talk to you, or told me how trivial my problems were, that I was acting like a child that was all for my benefit?!"

"Yes," I choked out. I was shocked that this was how Yugi really felt so forgotten and alone. I knew he felt neglected, but not this much. I had never seen him like this before.

"I can't believe this! What kind of twisted logic lead you to that conclusion?! I mean really I honestly want to know, what happened, Yami? We were so in-sync and now look at us! Was it something I did? Was I not good enough to be in your life?"

"No, no, Yugi, it was nothing like that! I just, I just thought that with us separated that it would be harder for me to protect you as I promised. I wanted you to grow stronger on your own. I did what I thought was right."

"It's all about you isn't it? What you say, what you think. Never what I think or what I want. Did it ever occur to you to talk to me, to ask how I felt about any of this? Of course not because Yugi will know what I mean even though I won't tell him he'll just know! Never mind that he'll feel unwanted and useless. It doesn't matter what he thinks or feels about anything, his opinion isn't important only mine! And all his friends will agree with me and will give him the cold shoulder, and he'll know we're doing it for him because he is a mind reader! Well in case you haven't noticed that big canyon out in the hallway I can't read your mind anymore!"

"You know about that?"

"Of course I do! I noticed the loss of something that had been near and dear to me for years and I didn't understand why it didn't mean anything to you!"

I was stunned if he knew about that then it was not a catastrophe brought on by the disease, but instead slow erosion over time from disuse, I should have known, should have sensed, but I hadn't and it had cost me dearly once again.

Yugi started speaking again his breathing heavy and his eyes filled with tears. "All-All I knew was that you wanted nothing to do with me and I thought I'd hurt you I thought I'd torn you away from something you dearly wanted and that you hated me!"

"No, Yugi, no I could never hate you, never!"

"Well then you're a wonderful actor!"

"I care about you, Yugi, I didn't mean to hurt you, you must believe me."

"What you meant is now immaterial. You have hurt me and coming here to tell you know that doesn't make it go away."

"Please, Yugi, I want to help."

"Oh, now you care now that it's all over now that there's nothing left to do but recover now you care now you help! Where were you when I was trying to make each insurance payment? Where were you when I ran down the hallways scared that someone would pull off my hat and the whole school would know I had no hair. Why didn't you care when I spent half my Saturday's sitting on a couch having chemicals pumped into my body or when I was so tired I couldn't get out of bed or when I was so sick I wasn't able to keep water down! Where the Hell were you?!"

"I-I…"

"You, you what? So I guess you got what you wanted I'm independent and no longer in your hair you must be so happy. After all I'm just some weak little child who can't stand up for himself!"

No, no he had to know I didn't mean it. I was just angry at the time, it hurt when someone would harm him and I over-reacted.

"Yugi, I didn't mean-"

"Oh, don't give me that of course you meant it! If you hadn't you would have to come to me and apologized and you didn't! And you know what, I don't think you're really sorry now you just don't want to feel guilty!"

At that point I got angry. All right so I had been an asshole, but at least I was making an effort to fix the situation he just wanted to lock himself away from it all! "So, you are just going to hide in here forever then?! Run away from your problems!"

"You don't understand, Yami, I was prepared for death! Cease to be, kick the bucket, shirk the mortal coil and join the choir invisible. I planned on being the ex-Yugi! And now look at me I can't even die right!"

My angry dissipated as fast as it had come and more shock replaced it. "You wanted to die?"

"No of course not nobody wants to die, but I was prepared to. I was sure I would walk in those hospital doors and never walk out again. I was not prepared to live to go back to that merger existence. I can't go on like that anymore I'm just too weak to deal with it all."

_Oh, Yugi._

He went back to the slab and sat down drawing his knees to his chest and resting his head on them. "Leave me alone, Yami."

"Yu-"

"Just go!"

Knowing when I was defeated I granted him his wish. As I was halfway through the door though I thought better of it and turned back. "Despite what you believe, Yugi, you are not weak and not one of us thinks that about you. I don't expect you to believe me, you have no reason to, but we really need you back."

He didn't answer. I sighed and closed the door. In a flash I found myself back in the hospital room. They were all looking at me expectantly. I just shook my head and for the first time since I'd found out about this whole ordeal I cried. I finally, truly, understood what was wrong, but now it looked like it was too late to do anything about it.

(End chapter 15)


	16. What a Wonderful World

Hooray! Life has actually given me a whole free hour to post this! Sorry for the long wait everybody.

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu gi oh it is the property of Kazuki Takahashi.

Narration ()

The Quiet One: What a Wonderful World

(Yugi spent a long time just sitting on the stone staring at the closed door after Yami left, wondering about the words he had said.)

_Was he telling the truth, do they really miss me? Do they really need me? No, no it couldn't be. He was lying! He just wants me to come back so he can clear his guilty conscience._

Why was I even still thinking about this? It was done and over with. I had fought and survived without them, but, but what I told Yami was true I couldn't continue on now. Now that they knew, knew that I hadn't raised all the money I needed to and that I would have to pay it back with all of them watching; knew my thoughts and feelings about everything. Now to have to recover from it all while they treated me like fine china, I didn't want that. Not before and certainly not now. I just wanted it all to go away; I just wanted to simply go away.

Instead of letting me wallow in my solitude the universe decided, instead, that I needed more company as I heard the door open again.

"Look, Yami, I'm not coming back, for you or anyone else, so why don't you just-"

I looked up fully to find that it wasn't Yami that had come in, but some man dressed in black leather, spikes, chains, and had his green hair styled into a Mohawk.

"Who are you, and how did you get here?"

"In answer to your first question I'm not going to tell you, and to your second," he shrugged. "I don't know this is your mind."

Then he grabbed me by the arm and yanked me towards the door. "What are we doing?"

"Ripping off an old movie plot," he said, as we stepped outside and the mist swirled thick and heavy around us.

"You said you wanted to go away this is what will happen if you do."

As the world around us went hazy with more smoke I just snorted at the prospect that I could actually change history by kicking the bucket. The entire idea was ludicrous. I was a teenager who had won a couple of card game tournaments, and whose friends and family had already proven that they were perfectly capable of living life without me. The world was not going to end just because I died. I was not that important.

The smoke and mist faded at last to reveal a perfectly normal street, on a somewhat cloudy day. This seemed to confirm my point the world was still there and not a smoking crater. Until the man with no name pointed out a building at the end of the street, the Game Shop. I immediately noticed that the paint had faded and started to chip. The grass around the building had grown tall and the side walk was in need of sweeping.

"Why is it so run down?"

"Your grandpa never had the heart to keep up the shop afterwards. He doesn't have anyone to share those walls with anymore or give it to when he is gone, so why bother?"

I actually hadn't thought about that. I had felt like such a non-entity in that house for so long that it hadn't occurred to me that he might actually miss my physical presence. Still I would have moved out on my own eventually and then surly Yami would have…but no he liked games, but selling them and interacting with the public on such a close constant level wasn't really his thing. It was true grandpa had no one to leave it to without me, but he was only one man. The others must certainly be doing better.

I got my answer as I turned around when some kicked a can across the sidewalk and saw Mokuba heading our way. I tilted my head quizzically at him, something looked off. His hair had always been long, but now it was matted and oily. His clothes looked even baggier than usual.

"Un-kept isn't he?"

"Obviously, why?"

The man rolled his eyes. "You really don't get it do you? You were his friend. His first in many ways and he liked you. Stayed with you even when the others didn't, didn't he?"

"Yes."

"He never hurt you, so why should he suffer?"

"Wait Mokuba is the world to Seto he wouldn't let his little brother go like that for me."

The man shrugged. "I can't tell you what exactly happened. I haven't seen much of him lately, no one has. Kaiba drowned himself in work, closed up again. Something tells me he never wanted to be hurt again."

No it shouldn't be like this. He was right they had helped me, they shouldn't suffer. I hadn't meant for anyone else to get hurt. It was supposed to be easier this way for all of them.

"What about Tristan, Joey, and Téa?"

"Tristan left. One night without warning nobody has heard anything from him in a few years now."

"But Joey wouldn't let him do that!"

"Well he's not really in a position to do much of anything."

"What-what do you mean?"

"He promised you he would always be there for you and he failed, broke that promise without a second thought. He never got over it, and went out to drink a lot after that. He was angry at everybody, especially himself. That attitude got him into quite a few fist fights. One night it earned him a knife in the back."

"You mean he…"

"Oh, no he lived, but there was damage."

The world shifted again slowly taking the shape of a small apartment. He sat at the window looking out at the park on the opposite side of the street, but I could tell he wasn't really seeing anything. The late afternoon sun reflected off the metal wheels of the chair.

I turned around at the sound of keys in a lock and a woman came into the apartment. Her hair was half in a bun the rest falling around her face. Wrinkles in her forehead, her clothes looking like they had seen better days.

"Téa!"

"Yeah, she comes over to help him everyday."

"Everyday?"

"He let his best friend die, and let the other one leave without even saying goodbye. He doesn't want to try, she makes him."

"But how can she do it all the time? What about her dancing?"

"She gave it up once she heard about Joey. She said she let a friend down once and never wanted to do it again."

I just stood there, a numb feeling starting to spread through my body. Could my being gone really cause all this? I still wasn't sure how to feel about it all. If what Yami said was true if he was sorry, if they all were truly sorry, this all might happen, and I didn't want to be responsible for that. I just wanted their lives to be easier and had assumed that it would be without me there. On the other hand though it was my mind doing all this, maybe I was simply projecting my need to feel important and central onto them. Still there was one person I hadn't been shown yet. One more who I knew in my gut would confirm what I was seeing. The question I knew I didn't want answered, but I had to ask.

"Where's Yami?"

The world shifted again this time to a sunset overlooking a hill. A hill with a willow tree that was casting shadows across a familiar white stone near its base. _Please tell me he didn't. _

I dropped to my knees; tracing my fingers across the second set of dates.

"No."

"All though it didn't seem like it to you, you meant the world to Yami. He couldn't bring himself to re-build his life when you were gone, didn't think he deserved it."

He had a life, he had been happy, and I had taken that all away from him again.

"I didn't know. Please tell me I can change this."

He didn't answer. I turned around to glare at him fully.

"Hey, I'm talking to you!"

Once again he didn't answer, he just stood there staring at the horizon as if, as if he hadn't even…heard me. I quickly got up and grabbed him by the shoulders to make him face me, taking in the brown eyes and the faded freckles.

"Ethan!"

"I was wondering if you'd figure it out."

"But why, you were doing so well, how…why?"

"Because the person who helped me achieve all that was gone. I never did trust much after that. Figured it was better to close up all my feelings than let myself get hurt again. I was too young to understand that you hadn't left on purpose, that I hadn't made you leave in some way. After a while it was just easier to lash out than deal with real issues, kind of like what you're doing right now."

The words cut like a knife, probably because they were true. It was easier to stay here and be mad and hurt rather than trying to fix it, but it wasn't right.

"So you see this is the kind of impact you had. You were important to so many and could have been to many more if you'd had wanted to stay, but if this is the way you want it to be…"

He began to walk away from me a bright light surrounding him.

"No wait! I didn't mean it! Come back!"

I took off after him into the blinding white light.

XXX

The first thing I became aware of was the strong smell of cleaning solution, then the feeling of rough fabric beneath my fingers; and the crunching of plastic. _Am I alive? _ Slowly I shifted my body and opened my eyes. I blinked for a minute, confused, before the white walls, and ceiling, of the hospital came into focus and I heard a familiar voice.

"Welcome back, Yugi."

(End chapter 16)


	17. Reconciliation

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu gi on it is the property of Kazuki Takahashi.

Narration ()

Once you've learned to be lonely and lonely is the only thing you know

It begins to feel like home

It becomes your comfort zone

Once you've learned to be without someone

And settled for the silence of an empty room

Oh it changes you

There's a lot you have to undo

Once you've learned to be lonely

- Reba Mcentire

The Quiet One: Reconciliation

(The room was deathly quiet. Everyone simply staring, wide-eyed, at Yugi, and then all hell broke loose.)

It was chaos. Téa started screaming and grabbed Tristan around the neck in a painful hug. Joey threw himself out of his chair in excitement, tripped over his feet, falling face first on the floor. Yami grabbed me by the shoulders and Grandpa ran out the room yelling for a doctor.

Finding the bed controls I slowly eased it up so I could see them a bit better.

"Good to see you awake, buddy."

"Yeah…we've been waiting so long we're starting to look like the living dead," Tristan said.

Téa lightly smacked him on the arm and glared at him.

"Okay, okay poor choice of words."

Grandpa's urgent voice from the hallway cut off further conversation.

"I'll be right there, sir, there is no need to harass anyone."

I turned my head as he came back in, practically dragging a doctor into the room.

"Good to see you're finally awake, Mr. Mutou." She said and held up her hand. "Don't try to talk yet or you're going to ruin a lot of our hard work."

She came over and checked everything, writing down several notes on a clipboard.

"We'll remove the tube in the day or two, and there will be some follow up treatment, but it likes really good. Now once the tubes out will change your diet and increase solid foods. You could stand to gain a few pounds before we discharge you."

I'd eat a ton of fries everyday if they asked me to, I didn't care. I was getting my life back. Something I had accepted as impossible. Judging by the way everyone was smiling at the news they were happy for me too.

XXX

Seto came by that afternoon once the gang had finally left. It was a good thing too because if the knew he could communicate with me better than they could, with pens and paper, they would throw a fit.

'Thank you, for coming and for everything.'

"You don't have to thank me for anything."

'Yes I do.'

"You're okay with having them with you?"

'For now.'

He glared. "You forgive too easily."

'They're not forgiven!'

I dropped my hands, sunk into the pillow, and stared up at the ceiling. I knew they cared about me and needed me, but they hadn't actually said they were sorry yet.

'I don't know what to do, Seto, a part of me does want to forgive them another part of me wants to hate them forever; the rest of me just never wants to leave this room. It isn't entirely their fault, I see that now, I never did seek them out. I just assumed they would react at certain way if I told them. Now that I know they truly care that they didn't do it on purpose I just feel so lost.'

"It is your call, Yugi, nobody can decide this but you."

I nodded and grabbed his wrist as he turned to leave.

'Come back tomorrow, please?'

He nodded and quickly left the room.

I spent a long time staring at the ceiling when he was gone. I knew I needed the rest, but I couldn't sleep. I didn't know what to do. There was no doubt that they had made poor decisions been down right stupid in fact, but they had never hated me, never felt I was weak or childish like I thought. Still how did-how could I forgive them for what they did? How could I tell them it's okay that they left me in this hell all on my own, how could I say I was all right, that we could all move on, when my body had been ravaged and hacked into by treatment and I still didn't think I would ever be really all right?

XXX

Over the next few days they came regularly to see me. Joey and Tristan came in and just stood there trying to start conversation. Téa just came in and cried. Yami and Grandpa always in together and liked to make small talk, about the shop or some TV show. The doctors came in regularly to take samples and run tests and on the third day the tube was finally removed.

"Try and say something."

"What am I supposed to say?" I asked my voice rough and deep; completely foreign to my ears.

She smiled. "That's good enough for a start, but don't over do it with your friends today."

Friends? Were they my friends again? I wasn't sure and I didn't think they were sure either.

She walked out as they filed in, and Yami actually came without Grandpa.

I was grateful that the tube was out because I was getting rather tired of using a pen and endless pads of paper.

"Hi."

That got a strong reaction as I expected it would. Téa hugged me and cried again. Joey and Tristan high fived each other and Yami just stood there silently, a strange expression on his face.

"We, we should really talk now…about everything shouldn't we?"

They all started babbling at once and eventually "Yugi, we are all so sorry,"was a coherent sentence to my ears.

"I know, and I'm sorry it turned out like this, but I am a stronger person now so maybe it was all for the best."

"No, Yugi, don't say that! Yes everything turned out all right, but that doesn't make what I- what any of us did to you okay!"

"Yami's right man!"

"I don't know how we're gonna fix this, Yug, but will think of something!"

And they would find a way to do that. It was what we did. Worked together and defeated everything that stood in our way. I just wasn't sure I wanted that. That they wanted this for us and not, as yet, another Good Samaritan project, I turned to look at Yami. I wanted to here it from him.

"Can I talk to Yami alone for a minute?"

They left quickly, closing the door behind them.

"Do you really like me, Yami?"

"What?"

"I mean do you think of me as more then just a guy you're supposed to protect?"

"Of course I do, Yugi! You are the most important person in the world to me. I didn't do all those things with you because it was my destiny or my obligation. I did it because I wanted to."

I just turned away from him and rubbed my shoulder. I wanted to believe him I really did…I just couldn't.

"Please believe me, Yugi. I'm sorry let me make it up to you…please."

"How can I believe you? You and the gang are here now as if nothing ever happened, but how can I trust you when for over half a year you did nothing, but belittle me? Shove me aside and pretend you didn't need me. Well now I don't need you! I don't need Grandpa and I certainly don't need those so called friends of mine I don't need anyone!"

"I know you don't, but I do."

I was stunned. Of all the things I expected him to say that was not it.

"If I am truly honest with you, Yugi, I did have alternative motives for leaving you. In a way I thought I was protecting you, but I was also doing it for me. I've never had anything outside of you in this time. Everything I have ever done has revolved around you. And when I lost you to the seal I completely fell apart. So, I wanted to prove that I really could be my own person away from you."

"And you have," I said.

He snorted in disgust. "No I haven't I just did what you did. I went out with your friends and went to all of your hangouts. I didn't build anything that was mine I just came in and took over what you had already built."

He sat down on the bed and took my hand in his.

"And in doing so I nearly lost you again. You're the most important person in my life I-would it sound really stupid if I said I think I love you?"

I let out a sound that seemed to be something between a sob and a laugh. "There was a time I would have given anything to hear you say that."

"I do love you, you know."

"No you don't not like you think you do. You love that little cherub that you could protect and comfort. You love the innocence child who balanced you out. You don't love this," I said gesturing to my body, "just like I don't love you. I loved the image I had of you. Of the fearless knight who rode on a great white horse and saved the day. I loved the image of a man who had no flaws who wanted nobody, but me. I don't love the man who is selfish, callous and dark."

He stared at the floor.

"I can change, Yugi."

"But I can't, Yami, I've been through too much to ever be your little light again and in the end it's not fair to make you change and be a person you're not just to fulfill my fantasies. You deserve someone who can love you, flaws and all, and there is someone like that for you, Yami, it's just not me."

"You don't know how much I hate myself right now, Yugi. How often I kick myself for making you feel the need to question everything we've ever been through because I was so selfish."

"You got a new start after all your hardship, a whole new change at life. You're happy and I can't fault you for that."

"But you can fault me for being happy at the expense of your happiness."

"If you're happy then I'm happy, Yami."

He looked into my eyes; his gaze serious and firm. "I know you don't believe that, Yugi, so don't think for a second that I will. Even you can't be that selfless. If all of this didn't really matter than you wouldn't be as angry and as hurt as you are, and have every right to be."

He was right. I was angry and hurt and that wasn't going to go away in a week or less, even if we were all sorry.

"I was an arrogant fool I should have sat down and talked with you about how I felt and what I planned to do. Instead I ran off half cocked convinced my plan was fool proof."

"And when I found about the cancer I should have tried harder to get your attention even if I had to put it on a roadside billboard."

He smiled a bit at that and I enjoyed seeing it; and smiled back.

"We both screwed up, Yami, the question now is what do we do, and can we fix it?"

"Honestly I just wish I could turn back time. To before any of this ever happened."

"I want things to go back to the way they were too, Yami, I just don't think they can. We've changed grown up, grown apart."

"I know, but we don't have to be lovers, but we can still be friends. I want to get to know you again to find out about Ethan and everything you've been doing. If you want to tell me that is. We all want that. I know we weren't there for you before, but we are now if you'll let us in."

I looked up and smiled fully.

"I'd like that."

(End chapter 17)


End file.
